Together forever.

Ch.49

Jamie's POV

Michael and I later there as we listened to the rain pitter patter on the roof, while the thunder clapped loudly. I love this.....but I'm not too sure if I love him. He got up and swooped me in his arms. He carried me upstairs and rested me on a bed. He leaned forward and kissed my forehead. He pulled the covers over me and looked me in the eye.

"You might not realize this, but you mean the world to me," he smiled. I looked at him and returned the smile, trying not to think of the fact that he's not mine. He walked out and I looked at the ceiling and cried to myself. I love him so much, yet I don't at all. What is going on I can't even think right. I got up and took my shirt off. I hate sleeping in clothes. I sat there until 11 at night crying to myself silently. I then got a message from Luke.

L: Hey babe, where you at

Me: None of your fucking business and I'm not your babe

I can't believe I just sent that. I'm just so angry and sad right now I don't even know what to do.

I closed my eyes trying to sleep but tears keep coming. I can't deal with this anymore. Finally I seemed to stop thinking and fell asleep.

**

*Bad dream*

I was running towards a church. When I opened the door I saw Michael and Brooke standing there. He was putting a ring on her finger. No, no, this can't be. He belongs with me. I was crying....making huge waterworks. The got married. I ended up alone. No heart. No soul. No love.

*dream over*

"Michael!!!" I shot up screaming. I looked around and saw I was still in the bed......but I was sweating and breathing heavy.

"Are you okay!?" A sweet voice said walking up to me. He felt my forehead and sighed.

"Shh, it was just a bad dream, go back to sleep," he said, giving me a bright smile.

I calmed down and rested my head on the pillow. He got up and walked out.

"Wait! Michael?" I asked.

"Yes dear?" He replied.

"Can.......can you stay here with me? Please?"

"Yes darling."

He sat on the bed and wrapped his arms around my waist and laid with me. I put my arm on his shoulder and took in his smell. I'd kill for this moment right now. He belongs with me.

**

I woke up to Michael laying on my bare chest. I smiled to the thought of always seeing him whenever I wake up....oh how glorious that would be. I brushed my fingers over his jet black hair. He had no shirt on either. I kissed his cheek and cried to my self again. I love him more than I love myself. I love him so much not even words can describe that.........and just cause of one mistake I let that all go. This is so wrong...but feels so right. How can I be sleeping with The King Of Pop? Wouldn't this spread bad lies on the media? I might have just ruined his career right there.......as long as no one finds out. I got out of bed and slipped my shirt back on. I looked at him wit tears streaming down my face. I kissed his lips for about a minute, just to savor the moment. I was now crying.......again. I can't do this. I got up and walked out of the bedroom. When I reached downstairs I called Luke and asked him to pick me up. Minutes later he came and I got into the car.  When we drove off its was an awkward silence.

"Luke I'm really-"

"Forget it, like what you said, its none of my fucking business."

"Just hear me out-"

"Shush, I'm trying to drive."

I fucked up big time. I finally got the urge to live my life but now everything is fucked up.  He dropped me off at my apartment and went into his. When I got inside I looked myself in the mirror. There was a blade beside the sink tat I couldn't stop looking at. I wonder what it would feel like...........

To be continued........

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