My Dream Boyfriend... Not In My Fathers Eyes....

14. My Dream Boyfriend... Not In My Fathers Eyes....

Chapter 14

Five days later

 Today was the day of the funeral.  Harold said that I wasn’t going to a nigger’s funeral.  I told him to go f*ck himself.  He was shocked, and just closed his mouth.  I hated staying with him.  I didn’t want to, but Gage said that I had to, for my safety. 

I was wearing my black dress.  I felt like a widow.  I wanted to die right along with him.  Ray, I mean.  My heart felt like it was torn apart.  I wanted to murder my sperm donor for killing the man I loved

Why was my life so screwed up?  Why couldn’t my life have gone like this:

My mom never died and Gage was never in jail, my father wasn’t racist, and neither was any part of La Cygne.  Ray moved next door, and Will broke up with me for another girl so I dated Ray.  We fell in love, and my dad actually approved of him, and we all lived happily ever after. 

God, I wish my life had turned out that way.  I walked down the stairs, being extra careful so I wouldn’t fall and injure myself so I couldn’t go to my boyfriend’s funeral. 

Petunia was waiting outside with Gage in the car.  He was in costume, of course.  I got in the car and they both smiled sadly at me.  I cried all the way to the graveyard.

When we got there, I wiped my eyes for I was p*ssed.  I opened the door before Petunia even stopped the car.  I slammed the door shut and walked over to the Klu Klux Klan members who were standing beside Ray’s casket. 

I walked up to them.  “And what do you think you’re doing here?”  I asked my voice stern.

“Well, we’re here to damn this nigger to Hell, because God don’t want yard apes on the Earth.  But, he doesn’t really need our help for going to Hell…”

I slapped him right in the face.  “Don’t f*cking talk about my boyfriend like that!  You guys don’t like him because of the color of his skin.  In the bible it says not to judge people.  What do you think you’re doing right now?  If you want to serve God the right way, stop living the way that you’re living now!  You don’t have any right to judge him, or any other black person!  I f*cking hate you guys!  I hate how you judge, I hate how you walk around thinking that you’re better than everybody!  Well, let me tell you this: you aren’t!”

I was too busy yelling and ranting on that I didn’t even notice that they had left.  I let out a choked laugh, and fell to my knees, crying.  “I’m so, so, so sorry Ray.”  I whispered. 

Petunia hugged me from behind and it soothed me.  Then reverend walked over to us, smiled sadly, and started saying prayers.  “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.”

 Ray’s mother broke down, sobbing into Angel’s shoulder.  Gage was holding hands with Rays littlest brother, Damien.  He was too young to understand that he was never going to see his older brother again. 

We left the graveyard with me crying my eyes out.  I didn’t want to leave Ray lying in the dirt, in some box that I had bought for 345 dollars.  They dropped me off at my house so that I could mourne by myself.  They didn’t want to be around me, a crying girl who wanted to die.

I went into my room, closed the door, and slid down it.  I cried into my hands.  The heartache kept getting worse and worse by the second.

Then, I got the worst, most amazing idea ever.  To get back at the person who killed Ray, who ever made fun of him or judged him or hated on him.

The feeling of loosing someone close is terrible.  The feeling of loosing someone you’re in love with is excruciating.  I will make them feel the pain that I feel now, and that Ray felt when he was alive.  I would kill them.

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hey guys.  it short, i know.  but surprising ending right??? :D lol.  hope you liked it, and for those of you who were wondering, my finger is almost healed! im so happy! it wasnt broken, just jammed, but it hurt! lol.  well, better get off this lep top cuz its my sisters n if she found out that i was on it shed be pissed.  so yeah, comment vote nd become a fan, PLEASE! :D