A Song For Another Time - A Hikaru Hitachiin Story

Chapter Twenty Five - A Second Hand Emotion

Molly and Kaoru were left in a sudden silence as the front door slammed for a second time in mere minutes. There was a beat before Molly and Kaoru turned their heads away from the door and looked at each other with slightly bemused smirks. Simultaneously the two of them realized something that Hikaru himself wouldn't come to terms with for quite a while.

But that wasn't the matter at hand currently and Kaoru didn't want to dwell too much on his brother's emotions. Frankly, he'd had enough of them lately and Rose's life was so much more interesting anyway.

If he were honest with himself, he did actually want to get to know her better, but in his mind this was all still a game. He was still storming the castle, searching for answers in an attempt to annoy the short brunette even more.

And, so, he asked more questions now that it was just he and Molly. He asked about Rose as a girl, about how she had flown through school so fast, about why she was usually so calm and collected and if she had always been that way. His curiosity knew no bounds and Molly's head was beginning to spin with all the questions being hurled her way.

"She was quiet when she came to us," Molly admitted. "And I have a feeling she was incredibly lonely. Rose used to hide away in her room all day and at night we'd catch her reading under her covers with a flashlight."

Molly giggled lightly at the memory. Rose had brought so much joy into the Richards' household, but she had carried sorrow with her there.

"Did she have any boyfriends in high school," Kaoru asked with a small, but impish smile. Molly was pulled out of her reminiscing by the odd question and she refocused on Kaoru's face with confusion bubbling in her eyes.

"My, my," she said. "Rose led me to believe that you boys were smart, but I see you are just like your brother. Though, I can't blame you. Reading others emotions must be all so new to you two."

Their initial analysis of Molly had been correct, Kaoru realized. She was incredibly scary. This woman had looked through him and his brother and read them like an open book.

She had this ability to just know, Rose's voice echoed in his head.

"But to answer your question, no," Molly said somberly. "To be honest, I don't think Rose knew what being loved felt like until she came here. The state - they don't exactly give you the whole back story when they place a child with you, but you can just tell when they get here. It's in their eyes."

"She didn't even know that birthdays were something to be celebrated," Molly continued. "When you grow up not knowing love, it's hard to even love yourself, let alone project love onto another person. I'd be surprised if she even noticed boys that way in high school. She was too busy figuring out herself."

- - -

The moment Hikaru was outside the door, he realized he was more of an idiot than he had ever imagined. He had absolutely no familiarity with his surroundings and Rose was in the neighborhood she grew up in. She could have gone anywhere and he could spend hours searching for her without success.

The thought of spending hours in the cold annoyed him, but he was at fault here. Maybe it would be cosmic punishment for him constantly choosing to ignore others' feelings - for being so completely horrid to so many girls for so long.

Sighing heavily, he set off from the porch and started walking down the street. His feet and heart seemed to know where they were going, so he decided to just follow their instinct and headed northward.

The Virginia winter air was cold, but nowhere near as biting as Boston's had been before they left. Now that he was standing out, searching for a familiar head of chocolate hair, he could hardly believe they had flown here just that morning. Despite feeling guilty, he also had an urge to scream out to clouds how utterly exasperating Rose was and how much trouble she had been since the moment he met her.

Still, though, his feet kept him moving forward, crunching over the last few remnants of fall and sloshing through muddied puddles. Fifteen minutes into walking through the neighborhood streets, Hikaru was about ready to give up. He stopped on the landing of a small wooden bridge that crossed over a frozen creek. Staring at his feet, all his thoughts were telling him it was useless trying to find her, and he had no idea what he was going to say anyway.

Hikaru turned to his right, sighing, and resigned himself to returning to the Richards' house. He looked up from his shoes just in time to see a flash of blue amongst all the brown surrounding the creek bottom and stopped mid turn.

Rose was sitting on the slope, near where the incline of the hill bottomed out - in her navy blue pea coat - and she was tossing pebbles at the water's frozen surface, watching the paths of the rocks' ricochets.

With a triumphant smirk, Hikaru stepped off the sidewalk and headed down the slope toward her. She was too engrossed in her distraction to notice him until he stepped on a twig just feet away from her back. Startled, she rose to her feet and turned to face the intrusion.

"Oh, it's just you," she said and turned back to face the creek. "What do you want?"

"To apologize," he responded, walking up next to her as she threw another stone. They watched its trajectory together before he turned his head toward hers. "I didn't mean anything by it. Really, I forgot you were a foster."

"Funny," Rose said, keeping her sights forward. "Sometimes, I wish I could forget."

Although she threw another pebble, Hikaru kept a puzzled gaze on Rose, searching her features for some sort of explanation. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he felt a little sorry for her and his stare softened.

"Don't look at me like that," she muttered, giving him a sideways glance. "Isn't it normal to wish you had a happy childhood with a family that loved you?"

I made her feel like this, Hikaru thought. This is my fault.

He didn't know what to do - how to respond to this vulnerability that she was showing. Her sudden trust in him was so raw and pure and completely overwhelming. Despite his best efforts, not a single appropriate response was formulating in his head and he did the only remotely sympathetic thing he could think of.

Reaching forward, Hikaru grabbed Rose's wrist and pulled her into a hug. It was a far from perfect moment as Rose stiffened in his arms and Hikaru wasn't sure where to place his hands, but it was a heartfelt apology nonetheless.

"I really am so sorry," Hikaru whispered into her hair, cradling the back of her head lightly into his chest.

"I know," she replied softly, finally moving her hands around his center and returning his embrace.

Hikaru tightened his grasp around her slightly before sighing in both relief and defeat.

"I'll try not to be an idiot anymore," he said, almost entirely seriously. Rose gave out a light chuckle as she pushed away from him.

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Hikaru," she said through a smile and started on the path back toward home.

The words didn't hit him at first, as he stood looking at the ground, but they processed soon enough.

"Hey!" he yelled, clearly insulted, and then took off after her.