I'll Be Seeing You

I'm such a Silly Girl

Two Months later

"Oh Phoebe love you look as pretty as a picture don't she Burt" my Aunty Lily says looking me up and down in my wedding suit, pale blue it was with a matching hat nothing fancy me and Jimmy said we didn't want a big fuss just something simple. We'd used the money that Mum had given us and got ourselves a little house a little two bedroom on a nice little street down in Stepney Green it was perfect our own little home I was so proud of it and couldn't wait to live in it to do all the little things that a wife does to cook to clean and keep house for my Jimmy.

There was this fear though in the back of my mind that he would soon be taken away he had enrolled in the Raf as we called it and was to go for training. This stupid stupid war I thought to myself but how could we let a monster like Hitler take everything from us like Jimmy said we had to fight for what was ours My Dad had completely cut me off said I was no daughter of his anymore in some ways I was sorry but others I was glad to be away from him. My Mum was getting weaker by the day but she would come and see me and we would meet in the park and go for walks but Dad had told her that she wasn't to see me which broke her heart and mine. She had sneaked out to come today but she looked so frail so tired
"Mum are you sure you are OK" I ask her "I'm fine love don't you fret look at you my little girl Jimmy is the luckiest boy in town today ain't he hey" she smiles a tear forming in her eye making my belly get all knotted "Mum please don't cry" I say to her "You'll make me cry" I tell her but it's too late "oh now come on Phoebe love none of that" she says sniffing away but I can't help it suddenly I'm overcome with a fear and sob harder and harder "my sweet girl what is it" Mum asks "I'm so afraid Mum afraid of losing Jimmy" I tell her "my darling you mustn't think like that not today" she says "I can't help it" I sob to her as I sit down allowing her to wrap her arms around me "oh my little Phoebe" she says "we have to grab all the happiness while we can and just pray to God that they keep our boys safe, your Jimmy, his brother, his dad all of them but I tell you one thing love your love for that boy will keep him safe give him something to come home for" she says "Now come on we don't want to keep him waiting" she says "I'll send Violet in" Violet was my cousin Mum's sisters girl we had been close while growing up and went to school together.

"Hey gel look at you hey quite the blushing bride" she tells me she was a girl of the world was our Violet had boys after her constantly forever hanging off some lads arm and yet had a heart if gold. "You're as white as a sheet Phoeb are you nervous"she asks "just not feeling too good haven't been for about a week now" I tell her and she looks at me "must be a case of the jitters sweetheart" she says "So you all set for tonight then Phoeb" Violet asks "what do you mean" I ask "you know" she says nodding at me "you're first time with Jimmy" she says and my cheeks start to burn and I cant help but let out a little smile "Phoeb" she screeches "You've already done it ain't ya"she says "hush Mum and Aunty Lily will hear" I say to her "well what was it like" she asks I get all bashful "it was lovely he was lovely Vi" I say as we grab hands and giggle like a couple of girls "Jimmy Flanagan well I never" she says "So when did this happen" she asks "when I first came to live here, we share Jimmy's Bedroom his Mum and Dad said we could" I tell her "So it's been more than once" she asks "bloody hell gel" she laughs "keep your voice down" I tell her though I'm grinning like mad "we might have to stop though" I tell her "why" she asks "because I....." "What Phoeb tell me" she says "because I missed my bleeding I think we must have done summit" I tell her because I had and didn't know why I hadn't missed it before "Phoeb how long has it been"Violet asks "I can't remember about seven weeks I think why" I ask "oh darling you really don't know do ya" she says rubbing my arm "know what" I ask what is this "you know when you and Jimmy you know" she's doing that nodding again "yeah" I say slowly "well does he..." she starts "does he what Vi what are you on about" I ask her "you really are the little innocent ain't ya" she smiles "when you and Jimmy make love does he leave something inside you" I can't believe she asked me that "Vi" I shout "no no no darling it's not bad you ain't done anything wrong just tell me" she says "well yeah he does" I tell her "then that's your answer" she says "I don't understand" I say "he's caught ya" she says I must look puzzled "Sweet Phoebe you're gonna have Jimmy's baby" she says. I must go pale and quiet "darling it's ok it's all ok" Vi says "have you been sick" she asks "I'm sick every morning" I tell her "and I feel funny" I say "oh Phoeb he's gonna be so happy" she says "oh my god" I say starting to cry through panic "what do I say to him" I ask "you tell him he's gonna be a daddy" she says "can I really have a baby I don't know anything oh god how pathetic am I, I didn't even geuss" I sob as she comes and takes me in her arms "you'll be fine we will take care of you and Jimmy will you know he will" she says.

"Phoebe love come on Jimmy's Dad is here its time to go" Aunty Lily says Jimmy's Dad bless him had agreed to walk me down the down the aisle "See you in a little while darling" Vi says "But Vi you can't just......" I start "Phoeb its all fine yeah don't fret" Jimmy's Dad walks in "Well are we ready......" He stops "Blimey Phoeb don't you look adroable gel" he says making me smile. I'm not sure what to say "Wait till that boy sees ya" he says "Do you think he'll like it" I say holding up my dress "He will just love it petal trust me" he says "And he'll be even happier when you tell him your news" he says "What news" I ask him "you teasing me now Phoebe you can't keep it from me his mother didn't" I'm lost yet again how many times is that today "you've got the same look about you that Margie had when she was carrying our Jimmy" he says and all I can do is sob I still can't quite believe it and others have noticed god what is wrong with me "hey hey come on sweetheart none of that" he says putting his arms around me "I'm so sorry I just I didn't know I'm so stupid I don't know anything" I says "you are far from stupid Phoebe love you are just the sweet sweet girl that captured my boys heart and he loves you so much and he is gonna be over the moon about this baby" he says "but I don't know what I'm doing I didn't even know I was pregnant Violet had to tell me" I tell him "I'm such a silly girl" I say and he shakes his head "now I won't hear that" he says "who will make a sweeter mother than you hey and none of us know what it's all about I nearly shit myself when I realized we were having Jimmy"he says making me laugh "but you've got us, and you've got the most loving...daftest lad in the world" he tells me "but he will be sent away you all will" I say "yeah to fight for everything we've got our homes our loved ones and that means this little one two"he says pointing to my stomach "now are you gonna come and marry him before he thinks you've done a runner" he smiles and I smile back wiping my eyes straightening myself all set to marry Jimmy, my Jimmy, my babies Daddy oh my lord.