I'll Be Seeing You

The Smartest Pilot in the Squadron

I try and take such care with his shirts, his trousers I've pressed them all for him and folded them neatly. I've shined up his shoes and the buckle on his belt I want him to look presentable I want others to see him and think "By golly he looks smart don't he" I didn't want anyone thinking badly of my Jimmy My husband, That still sounded funny and made me giggle inside but those feelings were over shadowed today by a feeling of sadness I had agreed to come to the train station to say goodbye to Jimmy as much as it was breaking my heart, he would only be away for a few weeks but they would possibly be the longest few weeks in my lifetime. And what then once he would be posted I would never see him but I couldn't think about that right now.

I felt so strange it was like my whole body was changing but Mum told me that was normal she was so pleased about the baby, she hadn't told Dad she figured it wasn't the right time she said, but would there ever be a right time with him. Jimmy had said that I should get Mum out of the pub and bring her to our little house but she had refused saying she didn't want Dad turning up and ruining things and would keep coming to see me when she could. Jimmy fussed me he wouldn't hug me too hard and was so gentle when we you know so afraid of hurting the baby he made me sit down a lot and brought me cups of tea the silly boy that he was so soppy but I loved him that way.

I watched Jimmy pack the last few things into his kit bag and as he ties it up I start to cry I cant help it. "Hey come on Phoebs none of that gel" he says coming over to me "I'm sorry I just don't want you to go" I say to him "And I don't wanna go either sweetie but I have to" The tears just keep coming "Here come and sit down" he says as he drags me to the little chair we have by the fire and sits me on his lap. I look into his eyes and stroke his face "It's gonna be alright my darling I promise and anyway Ive gotta come back ain't I to keep and eye on you and this little un hey" he says putting his hand to my tummy as he does a lot since I told him. I smile "Don't be sad my sweet Phoebe I will be thinking of you every minute of every day counting down the minutes till I can see you" he says to me "You are the most precious thing in my life Phoebs you know" he says "And you are to me Jimmy you are all I have" I sob "Then you ain't doing so bad" he jokes making me laugh "That's better that's what I like to see" he says "That pretty smile on my pretty gel" and he kisses me and I kiss him back trying to savour every second.

We arrive at the train station and it is packed soldiers, service men everywhere, young lads just kids themselves all kitted up and being sent away. We head to the platform where Jimmy's train is due there are just people everywhere its so crowded. Jimmy keeps me close panicking at all them all being so close. One lad pushes passed me in a world of his own and knocks me with his kit bag causing me to lose my balance "Hey watch what your doing you bloody idiot" Jimmy shouts at him "Whats your problem mate" he shouts back not an ounce of regret or a hint of an apology squaring up to Jimmy "She's carrying my baby fella alright so BACK OFF" he yells and the lad just lifts his hands up and walks off. I turn to him and smile so proud to be his girl "Come on Phoebs" he says pulling me even closer to him we walk to the end of the platform where its a bit quieter "My hero" I say to him and he looks down at me smiling "I fight anybody for you gel you know that" he says "I have to look after you that's what husbands do" he says picking up my gloved hand, putting it to his lips and kissing it. Just as he does we both turn towards to sound of the whistle from the train that's about to pull up I suddenly get a cold rush go through me and wrap my arms around Jimmy not wanting to let him go if I close my eyes perhaps it will all just go away.

"Oh my darling Phoebs please don't get upset" he says to me holding just about as tightly as he will allow himself to "I love you so much Jimmy" I say to him "And I love you" he says pulling me away looking down "both of you" which makes me sob all the more "Promise me you will write Jimmy" I beg him "I promise I will write as often as I can and look" he says plucking a photograph out of his coat its a picture of me "I will keep this by my bed and look at it every night before I go to sleep and think of you" he has got to be the most amazing lad in the whole world. He goes to jump on the train and pull the door closed opening the window as he does taking my hands in his "Now promise me Phoebs that you will get plenty of rest look after the baby for me" he asks of me "Of course I will" I say "And keep our little house spick and span" he jokes and I laugh at him "I'll miss you so much" I say to him "I'll miss you too" he says with tears forming in his eyes no he cant cry that will make me worse. The guard sounds the whistle and I just burst into tears "Phoebs come here" he says pulling me to him kissing me once again "Don't fret sweetheart it will be fine" he says as the train starts to pull away "I love you my darling I love you" he says as he starts to pull away from me "I love you too Jimmy I love you I love you" I shout making him smile as he blows me endless kisses until he has gone out of sight and under the bridge. I feel empty, lost, alone, so scared....................Jimmy my smartest Pilot in the Squadron Oh My darling Jimmy