20 Again

Part 2

Jimin POV
2 AM.
I open the door cautiously so that I won't make any noise. The light is on & Y/n's shoes are haphazardly strewn in front of the door. It looks like she threw them off in a hurry.
I take off my shoes & put hers tidily on the rack as well before tiptoeing into the living room. The room looks a mess, especially the kitchen. Cold porridge solidifies in the pan on the stove, half-eaten frozen meal lies uncovered on the dining table, & the whole apartment smells like somebody vomited all over it.
I push the bedroom door open & see Y/n slouching on the chair, snoring lightly, right by the baby's crib. One of her hands is wrapped in bandage.
A tiny smile lifts the corner of my lips slightly as I watch Jisung sleeping peacefully in the crib, an already-lukewarm cooling patch stuck on his forehead.
I gently carry Y/n to the bed & put the blanket over her body. She's lost weight. Her long hair, once bouncy & thick, looks thin & dull now. Frown lines decorate the space in between her brows, adding years to her real age.
You must have suffered a lot after marrying me.
I quietly step out of the room & walk pass a mirror. I check my own reflection, the foundation I used to cover up the bruises on my face has smudged revealing the purplish blemish underneath.
I hope Y/n won't notice. Arghh.. molla..
I throw myself onto the couch & close my eyes.
What a long hard day..

Y/n POV
"Ma.. Ma.."
Jisung's call wakes me up from my sleep.
"Jisung ah, eomma is here!" I spontaneously exclaim as I get out of bed.
Hm? How did I get into bed last night? Ah, maybe I was too tired so I don't remember moving.
I touch Jisung's forehead & breathe a sigh of relief.
"Thank God, your fever is gone. Are you hungry? Eomma will cook up something delicious for you, ok? Wait here for a while." I say as I tenderly pinch his rosy cheeks.
The first thing that hits me when I walk out of the room is the reek of alcohol. Then, I see the source lying unconscious on the sofa.
My husband.
His suit is thrown carelessly on one end of the sofa. The decorative pillows I had just washed the day before are scattered all over the floor.
The scene from last night comes to mind. The woman's voice on the phone. His heartless response.
All of those make my blood boil.
How dare he sleeps so peacefully after what he did last night?!
"Wake up. Wake up!" I say, trying to keep my voice low for Jisung's sake, as I hit him with a pillow.
"Huh? What time is it?" Jimin lazily rubs his eyes & yawns.
"Where did you go last night?" I ask flatly.
"I was with a client." Jimin answers nonchalantly as he sits up.
"That's what you always say! Do you know that i was scared to death because Jisung was so sick last night? Do you even care?!" I can't contain my anger anymore & yell at him.
"Can you please stop shouting? My head hurts. Besides, Jisung is fine now, right? So stop making a big deal out of it." He waves me off & lies back down again.
"Park Jimin!" I can't believe he dismisses me so easily like that, not even caring about what I went through.
"What?! Tell me, what more do you want me to do?! Do you even know what I went through yesterday?! I sacrifice so much for this family yet you-" He jumps off the couch abruptly & shouts back at me.
"Your sacrifice? What about mine?! If you feel so extremely burdened, why don't we just get a divorce?!"
The moment the word slips out of my lips, I know that there's no turning back, no way that we can go back to what we used to be. There's just too much regret & resentment in between us, overwhelming the pure love that we once had for each other.
Jimin is stunned by my question. He freezes in spot, staring at me with wide eyes.
"Did you mean what you said?" He asks in a flat tone.
"I- I did." I stubbornly reply, ignoring the disquiet spreading in my chest.
"Fine. Let's get a divorce then." Jimin stonily says.
Jisung's loud cry can't even drown the sound of my heart shattering into pieces, but I keep a straight face on, refusing to acknowledge how devastated I am.

-•-

Y/n POV
"Ya, don't you think you've had too much already? Stop drinking." My best friend, Nami, takes the soju bottle away from my hand.
"Give it back to me." I slur. My hand slips on the table as I try to stand up & grab the bottle from her hand, causing my head to bang hard on the table.
"Ya. Ya! Y/n ah? Are you alright?" She shakes my shoulder in panic when she sees me not moving an inch.
"Please give it to me. I need it." I whimper without lifting my head.
"No, you don't. This will only give you a terrible headache tomorrow morning." She moves the bottle even further away from me.
"I do! I need it to forget about all this shit! Please, let me at least sleep in peace just for one night." I look up at her with bloodshot eyes.
It's been three days since I asked for a divorce & Jimin moved out of the apartment. I haven't been able to sleep at all for that long. My memories with Jimin haunt me every single minute, deepening my regret.
Why does this happen to me? How did we end up like this?
"Y/n ah, if you're suffering so much, why don't you just get back with-"
"Stop right there! Don't even say it. I don't want to listen." I raise my palm & cut her off.
"Huh... Why are you so stubborn? Have you thought this through? Divorce is messy business, especially when there is kids involved. Have you thought about what's going to happen to Jisung?"
I'm lost for words for a moment.
Jisung. My precious son. He'll grow up without a father & it's all my fault.
Like a broken dam, the pent up emotions flow out of me in streams of tears. I bury my face in my hands & bawl, ignoring the strange look from the other guests in the bar.
Without saying a word, Nami moves to my side & pulls me into a hug. She strokes the back of my head, trying to calm me down.
"Nami ya, can you please take this pain away from me? Just one minute. My heart feels like it's being cut to pieces & it can't stop bleeding." I cry on her shoulder, wetting her expensive shirt.
"Shhh.. Everything will work out in the end." She says gently.
"I hate him Nami ya. My life has been going downhill ever since I married him. I wish I had never met him at all."
And right that moment, a lightning splits the night sky.

At the same time, Jimin POV
I don't know how long I've stayed in this position, lying on my tiny single bed in my parents' house while staring blankly at the plain white ceiling.
My parents were shocked when they saw me knocking on their doors in the middle of the night with a large suitcase in my hand. But somehow, I felt like they had seen it coming.
"Son, do you want some supper?" My mother knocks on my door & pops her head into my room.
"Thank you eomma, but I'm not hungry." I immediately turn my body towards the wall to hide my face.
"Huh.. You haven't eaten anything for the past three days. You'll get sick." She sighs as she sits beside me on my bed.
"I won't. I'm just not hungry." That's a fact. Ever since Y/n said those three forbidden words, I've lost my appetite. A bitter taste lingers in my mouth every time I think about that awful night. Jisung's cry, her hateful stare, my hopelessness.
How did we end up like this? We were so in love. She was my everything & I was hers.
"Jimin ah, I know this must be hard for you, but you can't give up. Even if you & Y/n separate, you still need to think about Jisung. He's your son too." She puts her hand on my shoulder & gently squeezes it.
Jisung. I wonder if she'll ever let me see him again. I'd been such a bad father. I didn't even get to say goodbye to him when I left.
A sharp pain pierces through my heart & a drop of tear rolls down the bridge of my nose. I quickly wipe it away with my blanket & sniff quietly.
"Jimin ah, if you want to cry, it's ok. Eomma will forever be on your side."
My weak defense crumbles down at her kind words. I let out a huge sob & cover my face with the blanket, letting tears flood my face.
"Everything will be fine. You just need to persevere. Don't let this bring you down." She says as she pats my back.
But she has brought me down. I shouldn't have given up my career for her. I wish I had never met her.
Outside, lightning flashes through the dark clouds & everything goes quiet.

-•-

Y/n POV
The sun rays peeking through the blinds make my eyes flutter open.
God, my head hurts. I shouldn't have drunk that much last night.
I think to myself as I squirm under my blanket & rub my eyes. I turn my body sideways & hug my pillow, drifting back to sleep again.
Wait, something doesn't feel right.
I abruptly open my eyes & stare at the book shelf across my bed. The bright sun light casts a shadow of it on the bare wooden floor.
This is not my apartment.
I instantly sit up & the sharp movement makes my head hurt even more.
"Ow!" I exclaim as I squint my eyes.
Suddenly, the door busts open & a slim middle-aged lady barges into my room.
"Ya, Kim Y/n! How long are you going to sleep? Have you forgotten that you agreed to help your sister today?" She crosses her arms & yells at me.
Wait..
"E-Eomma?" I slowly get out of my bed & widen my eyes in disbelief.
"What's wrong with that face? Are you still drunk? You know I had to clean up your mess last-"
I run to her & hug her tightly. Tears stream down my cheeks as I feel her warmth.
"Is this a dream? You're still alive. You're ali- Ow!"
My sentence is cut off by a hard smack on my head.
"Ya! Of course, I'm still alive! Are you cursing me? Go take a shower & help me prepare breakfast. You smell like a drunk old man." She crinkles her nose in disgust.
I stare at her, still not believing that she is real.
If this is a dream, please let me stay in it for a while longer.
"I love you eomma. I really really love you, sorry for not saying it enough." I hug her again & rest my chin on her shoulder.
"What's up with you today? Are you sick?" She pushes me away & puts her hand over my forehead in concern.
"No. I'm just so happy to see you again." I smile at her.
"Tsk.. What a weird girl, just like her dad. Come out quickly or you'll be late." She flicks my forehead & I flinch in pain.
Wait a minute. If I can feel pain, does it mean that this is not a dream?
Panic begins to rise in my throat as I pinch myself hard.
"Ow! That hurts." I yelp.
"What again?" Startled, my mother turns around & asks.
"Eomma, what date is it today?" I ask her, goosebumps rising on my arms.
"Uhm, May 5th I think."
"What year?" I try my hardest to control my voice.
"2015 of course! Stop asking silly questions & get ready!" She closes the door behind her, leaving me alone in the room.
I frantically look for my phone & find an old iPhone 5S on the desk. I tap in the passcode, eomma's birthday, which I've used since forever for everything & the phone instantly unlocks.
So this is really my phone.
I quickly check the date & it is indeed May 5th, 2015.
The phone slips out of my hand & falls onto the floor.
What the fuck is happening?
My fingers tremble as it hits me that I've somehow gone back five years into the past.