Jamaican Rant Book

What I hate.....

1. You know what I hate....I hate when the teacher hovers over me when I'm doing a test. Like Lawd A wah, u can't wait, anuh like u nah guh get fi see wah deh pan it anyways!!! Chro and a mek mi nervous.

2. When teachers bawl off their hair and wear wigs. Like DF! (-_-)

3. When teachers give you an assignment to write an essay and it's due first period the next day. I just want you to know that I hate you :)

4. When teachers bawl off their hair, mek it grow out and bawl it off again and draw on wan old piece a wig!!!  -_-

5. When your madda call you fi cum pass di remote fi har wah deh right beside har pan di couch weh she a sidung pan.

6. When you have one minute of class left and the teacher be stalling so the time run off before you get let out!! Like why?????

7. When you wake up in the mornings to take a bath but the water be too cold. Damn!

8. When you a watch one show and it a get nice enuh and den di dutty people dem cut to commercial. BBC it annoying!!!

9. When people be doing the same shit as you and be be judging.

10. When rain fall and you a walk pan di road side and car cum splash up dutty wata pan yuh good up clothes.

11. When yuh well hungry and guh luk inah di fridge and nun nuh deh deh fi eat! THE STRUGGLES are real

12. When you guh cover up your food, guh bathe and find out seh di light gone so you food end up cold and you can't eat it -_-

13. When yuh friend dem and u a go out and yuh outfit well deh pan point and dem change dem mind.....

14. When yuh mada seh she nah come home from work till late so u nuh tidy di house till one hour before she come....and she come early.

15. When you inah yuh bed a sleep well good and somebody a call yuh phone 2 am inah di morning and ask "Free Nights?".

16. When yuh inah di cinema a watch wan movie and somebody deh behind you a chat loud and a talk out di movie. If a tun round and gi yuh two rasclaat lick u see!!!

17. When yuh walk up early morning and a smile pan yuh face cuz a holiday time and you can relax and you mada call u and tell yuh seh u have chores fi do.. -_-

18. When you mada sen u guh shop fi guh buy ar sum inah di hot sun. She brite eehh mi a wanda, so she cah guh do it ar self????

19. Whn u guh a shop fi guh buy sum and di shop lady di sell it fi $40 yesterday and she a sell it fi $80 now.... an when mi seh mi nah bada buy it she a talk bout she a guh come sell it fi $40....Damn scammer she be man a cuz she see di bag a ching ching mi have up inah mi hand middle...damn thief.

20. When you a cook and di damn hot oil decide fi come splash up pan yuh. I seh when I dun bawl out and scream....dam pot wicked...dats y mi nuh like cook enuh it eva a bun mi up...so mi just cover up mi hand wid some cloth and wear di oven mitts.