"I am not gay"

Aftermath

Before I know it, he's asleep, and then so am I.

My eyes flutter open to Carl cooing and gently playing with my hair.  Good, he doesn't hate me yet.  He has to be sober, so there are feelings in there somewhere.  I groan and roll over facing him "Morning" I mutter.  "Morning, you sleep well?  I hope so, because it's like 1 in the afternoon" He chuckled softly, lightly touching the hickies I left on him last night, wincing slightly.  They're dark, and seemingly sore, like any other kind of bruise.  I can't read his expression, I don't know if he's happy with them or regretting it.  He almost looks worried, which is making me worried.  My mind is going a thousand miles a minute.  "Shit..  Yeah, I uh, I slept fine, I'm sorry I left you awake by yourself for so long.  Did you sleep well?  You kind of passed out on me last night.." I chuckle trying to lighten the now obvious tension.  "Oh yeah, I slept really well.  It's uh, been a while since I've had the comfort of sleeping next to someone.." He mentioned slyly.  So, he liked it?  It's really hard to tell, because I just about fucked my seemingly straight best friend, and we slept entangled with each other.  I think we're both kind of anxious about it.  Carl sat up, "I liked it." he said flatly looking at me "What we did last night.  I liked it.  I like it.  I like knowing that you left these marks on me." He said taking off the sweatshirt revealing a countless number of other love bites I gave him.  He scooted closer and I sat up as well.  "I love knowing, that I left these on you" He said tracing the hickies scattered on my neck.

I sighed quietly in relief.  He picked my chin up to make me look at him.  "I love the thought, of my mouth on your neck, leaving those hickies, like I'm marking my territory." He said as he leaned in, biting my neck lightly, and I know it'll leave another hickey.  I didn't know he could be so posses.  'My territory' the words bounced around in my head.  "So, do you think you've figured out the whole sexuality thing?" I ask quietly.  "No, but I couldn't give two fucks.  Elliot, I like you.  I really, really like you.  I don't want to rush into anything, but I don't want to stop this." He told me calmly.  "Okay" I nodded lightly "I like the idea of that,".  "Welp, I'm bored, get ready, let's go do something, get some air." He said wiggling his way out of the covers and off of my bed.  I had the perfect idea.  "Where omething kind of outdoor-sy if you can, you can borrow some clothes if you need." I told him as I got up and headed to my closet.  He wants fresh air, I'll give him fresh air.  He started getting dressed as I picked out my clothes.  An old pair of jeans, stained and ripped to shreds.  A simple grey tee, and an old Hollister jacket.  As I got dressed I could feel Carl's gaze burning into me.  "Take a picture, it'll last longer" I chuckled as I sat on my bed to pull on my socks.  I looked over at him, looking him up and down.  He was in a black muscle tee, worn and distressed jeans, and some tattered sneakers.  He smirked as he watched my eyes scan him.  "Take a picture, it'll last longer" He mocked.  I threw a sweatshirt at him and chuckled.

I grabbed an empty backpack and we headed upstairs.  I put on an old pair of dirty boots and walked into the kitchen.  Carl sat at the table while I started to grab water bottles and a few snacks.  "So, what are you preparing us for?" He asked curious about the days plan.  "It's a surprise" I tell him as I start making two simple lunches, bagging it all up and placing it carefully in the backpack.  I ran into a hallway and grabbed an old blanket and two towels, but hid the towels from him trying to not give him any hints.  I slid them into the bag and zipped it all up.  Carl stood up, but before we left I grabbed my blue tooth speaker off of its charger on the counter.  I grabbed my keys and we headed out to my car.  I put the bag in the back as Carl got it.  I started the engine and listened to my car roar to life.  I tuned the radio to a decent channel before taking off.  It was just warm enough to comfortably roll down all the windows, so I did.  The air blew this way and that as I drove us down back roads, Carl and I sharing laughs as we sped along.  He asked multiple times where we were going, but I wouldn't give in.  We had been driving for about an hour and a half in what seemed like the middle of nowhere, and I pull my car into a small dirt lot completely surrounded by trees.  I rolled up the windows, put the car in park, and killed the engine before getting out and grabbing the bag from the back and slinging it over my shoulders.  I walked up and opened Carl's door since he had yet to get out, and held out my hand.  He took it as he got out and closed his door.  He looked between me and the extensive forest in front of us.  I smirked and was damn near crawling out of my skin.  He looked at me "You've gotta be fucking kidding me".