Undivided || Lai Guanlin Fanfic ||

CHAPTER 6: Alone

YOUR POV

The sun has already set minutes ago but I am still laying down in the bed, with the same position, same clothes, and same thoughts.

Is Jun, my brother doing fine right now? Or is he blaming his self again for putting me in so much trouble?

As much as I don't want to leave the castle I was also being intoxicated with all the rules, the tasks, the orders, the schedules, and our parents.

I know I agreed to my brother very well that I will inherit the throne and become the queen one day but I am so tired. I can't broke rules, even if it's the simplest of them all rules will always be rules and just by breaking a single table manner I always get glares from my parents, the once happy and normal dinner we always have was now becoming quiet and cold. The tasks that should be done has to be finished all in one day, if I don't I have to spend time sorting books at the library as a punishment, the once fun place where I always read book to discover amazing things was now the place where I mostly cried to myself. The orders from my mother and father is another intoxication piece of shit, I was now being treated not like their daughter but like a machinery that they can just order around thinking that I won't get tired. But heck I was so tired; the castle that once created my whole childhood was now becoming a hell for my teenage and soon adult years. The schedules I have all day is tight I need to go back and forth from the village then to the castle then to the forest, I have to walk, to run, bare foot or not I still have too, my feet hurt every time but I never reclaimed cause I can never do anything, the white snow that I was stepping on somehow receive red dots without me noticing. And my parents? They're never been like that, we were so happy, like what a perfect family would look like but ever since I've confirmed that I'll be taking over the throne when the right time comes, they become very intoxicating. I am not a machine. I get tired, I cry, I get hurt, I can have wounds, I can die.

Those things keep on circling my heads over and over again as if it was a cycle that never stops.

I didn't notice that my tears are already pouring down my face until I got to taste my own tears. I immediately sit up from the bed and started wiping up all the tears that strained my face. I stood up from the bed and took all the time I have to distract myself.

I decided to explore my room. I already observe all the things I can see here but I've never got to touch anything apart from the bed I was laying on moments ago. I went inside the garderobe where I changed my clothes on and open the big cabinet that welcomes me as I entered the room.

I look over to what clothes are in here and everything looks really pretty and elegant, maybe these dresses are owned by a princess because there is no way the king or Guanlin can wear this. I closed the cabinet and decided not to interfere with the things inside and avert my gaze back to the interior.

The walls and floor even the ceiling is composed of ices but with different patterns and all of it are so beautiful. I take time to adore everything touching and inspecting to how does this results to be so pretty and elegant at the same time. I exited the garderobe once satisfied with the things I've take time to observed and return to my room at least that was what Yeri told me. I walk over to the bookshelf I just saw and grab books to make time pass by like what I always do back at the snow castle and sat on the window sill and make myself feel comfortable.

I opened the book that caught my attention and tried to understand what it is all about. But right when I thought it was a book, it was a diary all this time. So this room was really not for guest or any who it's the room of the first queen, Guanlin's grandmother. As I look through pages a picture slip out of the pages and dropped to my lap. I pick it up and scan the picture.

"So this is what the first king of ice kingdom look like" I said seeing the face of the person who started all this war.

Next to him was the owner of the diary the first queen of ice kingdom, sitting just below her is the current king Guanlin's father and next to him was his queen which is holding Guanlin on her lap. But Guanlin was still a baby in this picture so that means this takes place a long time ago.

The first queen and king are already dead and I didn't saw the face of Guanlin's mother around here in the castle and only got to meet Guanlin and his father. I heard that Guanlin's mother died because of a serious illness that no one can cure just decades ago.

I went back to the very first page when I didn't found any more pictures and started to scan through the notes the queen made

"I wonder how do they write there entries" I said before reading it silently but the my dismay I didn't got to understand some of the hand writings

I went to the second page and it was more unreadable, it goes on like that until the following are stained with tears and the last one was torn. I closed the diary with a confused expression.

"I wonder what could've happen" I said before returning the diary back to its original place and just in time the door opened