Beautifully Demonic // Harry Styles

Chapter 5

I been sitting here, watching Michael, waiting for movements of any sort. As the minutes go by I become more uneasy, I brought this upon him, I caused unneeded pain. Instead of kissing him I should have pushed him away, telling him to leave and never come back, to forget about me like the rest of my family and friends. I know exactly how harry is, and who I am now, I'm not the same, life is no longer the same for me. I see his eyes twitch and I examine him closer, his eyes open wide, looking around. He opens his mouth and words try to escape, but a cough comes out instead. I pat his back and then rub it, he looks uncomfortable so I stop.
"Why would you let him do that to me?" He say slowly taking a breathe between words.
"I'm sorry." Is all I could manage to say because I don't know the answer to his question. Why didn't I stop harry, or why couldn't I?
"W-we can run away, you can leave this hell you live in , you don't have to be scared of him."
Tears begin to fall from eyes.
"I just can't." I say looking away
"You can Alana, with me."
"No dammit, I said I can't." I say as a wave of anger runs over me. His eyes loose the look of hope that were once in them.
I stand up and walk toward the gate, opening it, not turning around. Once I get to the steps i then say in a soft voice, "sorry michael."
I walk straight to my room, opening the door and shutting it behind myself. I climb on my bed, pulling my knees to my chest. Hours pass of staring into nothing, leaving my mind blank of any thoughts, thoughts that will make me feel worse than I already do.
A small knock is heard on my door, I continue to sit in my same spot, not moving.
"Alana do you want some pizza?" Harry says standing in my doorway. I simply nod no.
"You have to eat something." He pushes
"No." I say stirnly
Harry closes the door and comes back a few minutes later with a slice of pizza and water, he places it on my dresser and walks out. I pick up the water and drink it, placing the empty glass down. I lay down on my bed, facing my door and closet. I see a piece of white paper come under my door, but I'm not in the mood to read it. I close my eyes pretending I never saw it, wishing this aching pain would go away. I feel alone, I feel like a freak. My heart has turned to black, not giving a damn about anyone but myself. I want someone to love me, I want my old life back, I want it to be how it used to be. Harry has changed me, there is no going back, even if I wanted to. Harry calls the shots, I am the puppet while he is my master. I extend my arm, reaching for the note that lays folded on the wooden floor.
It reads as follows :
" I tried Alana I really did. I love you with every bone in my body, but I'm afraid you just don't feel the same way. I know how you feel toward harry, I get it, that's how I feel for you. Harry let me go, he said there was not point in keeping me here, and he is right. I know this isn't the right way to say goodbye, but I feel better doing it like this. Also I will not have worry about you trying to stop me. I knew you would never come with me, so this is what I had to do, for myself. I love you xx -Mikey "

I jump up from my bed, opening my door. I run into the living room looking all around, harry stares at me confused, I open the front door, stepping into the snow with only my socks on. I begin to call Michael's name, only receiving my echo in return. I scream in agony, my knees bucking, my vision blurring. The winds devoured any warmth from my body, my lungs collapsing from the bitter cold. Harry walks to the step, "you need to come inside." Tears blurry my vision more, my chest hurt, I'm not sure if it's from the cold or Michael leaving. He was all I had left from my past, the person I could have faith in. I blew it, I fucked up, there is no chance of me ever seeing him again. Even if it could not stop him from leaving I could at least said goodbye. The last memory he has of me is being a bitch, not the happy girl he used to know. I wrap my arms around my body, trying to get warm. I feel a blanket come over me, and I quickly wrap it around my body. "Come in when you are ready." I nod. If I went to hell it wouldn't be as bad as living here.