Together, Always || An After Mockingjay Everlark Fanfiction

Chapter 5

I get into bed early that night but despite how exhausted I feel my eyes refuse to get heavy. I am terrified of the thought of the nightmares I will face tonight to the point that I am depriving myself of needed sleep.

After at least an hour of staring at my bedroom roof I decide that it's no use. I drag myself out of bed and trudge down the stairs to sit on the carpet in front of the fire.

Unnecessary paranoia forces me to turn around so that I can see every corner of the living room. With my back uncovered and seeing nothing but the wall I am vulnerable to an attack. It relaxes me a bit to be able to see everything even though the only moving thing in the room besides me is the dancing flame now radiating heat onto my back.

I leap up from the floor in fright as I hear a soft knock at the door. I take a moment to recover and peak out the window to identify my late visitor.

Peeta stands at the door. I am taken aback by how utterly broken he seems.

He looks absolutely miserable. Burn scars are scattered across the skin that isn't hidden by his pajamas. His hair is disheveled and I can see spots where his blond curls have been singed off by the same raging flame that claimed my body. He looks quite skinny like me and he doesn't look as muscly as he once did.

It's his eyes that unhinge me the most. His stunning blue iris are surrounded by the bloodshot whites of his eyes and underneath them are heavy bags that could easily be mistaken as bruises.

The games, the war and the endless torture he had to endure have left him broken beyond repair. I can't help but hold myself accountable for some of the damage too.

In this moment I realize that I will never see the old Peeta again. The Peeta that used to run around happily in the schoolyard when we were kids. The Peeta that used to beautifully decorate cakes at the bakery. The Peeta that announced his undying love for me to the whole of Panem before the first games. The Peeta that tried to protect me from harm in both the 74th and 75th games. He has loved me unconditionally for all of these years and I have only just discovered how much he truly means to me. I guess you only realize how much you love someone when they are no longer there.

I loose my train of thought and open the door as I notice Peeta start to shiver in the cold night. As soon as he sees me he wipes the miserable expression of his face and lifts his chin. I can tell he is only staying strong for me.

"Couldn't sleep?" he asks.
"No. You?"
"Nope."

I plonk myself back down onto the carpet and Peeta follows me. He squats down slowly and sits in an awkward position. The prosthetic must be bothering him.

I watch the flame dance in his bloodshot but still breathtaking blue orbs until my eyes are ripped away when I notice something else.

A thick pink scar starting behind his left ear snakes across his neck and down his back into his T-shirt. I quickly recognize the mark as the same Gale once had on his back. A shiver runs through my spine as I imagine Snow throwing questions at Peeta that he can't answer, resulting in a whip being brought down hard on his back.

~Peeta POV~

Katniss starts to tremble beside me and I'm almost certain its not from cold. I wrap an arm around her and attempt to rub some warmth back into her bony arms. Her head falls onto my shoulder and I hear her breathing become steady, telling me that she has fallen asleep.

I scoop her up and carry her to bed. This isn't a very challenging task as her frail body doesn't weigh much more than a small child's.

I tuck her into bed and kiss her forehead lightly. I'm just walking out of the room when I feel her hand grasp mine and pull me into bed next to her.

For the second night in a row we fall asleep in each others arms.