Mute Voices: Spoken Word

Outlet 21

                           Wasted Time
Time is something I can't get back; I've spent so much of it waiting on you, for You to love me the way I'm supposed to be loved. But instead you chose to run the streets, spend your time with a figment of Street life. I cry silently in my bed, you have no idea the thoughts that are inside my head.

Years, yes, that's what I used to be: apart of your world, yet still you don't see me or this pain. You don't even realize how much I'm going insane. I can't  compete on a journey that's not winnable. I can't move past the part that has had me stuck all these years; fear of being without you. Holding on to just a small piece of who we are isn't enough; times like these are getting to be way too rough, I have no way to escape this feeling, it's not like you're even willing, so how would I begin the healing?

Life is so much smaller now, I have no one to tell me I'm worth it, no one to hold me and make me feel like I'm living in a dream. This is not how it all seems. I try to spend time doing the things we did when we first met. I guess that's the part I haven't left yet. I'm focused on how it used to be and you're focused on how it is now, that's why this is falling into the deep end. You don't care that I'm in need of a fairy tell end.

Time waits on no  one young or old.  I thought long and hard on why your so cold. Coldness isn't a good look on you, it ruins the impact you had on me; just let go and let it be. Your free, that's what you wanted all this time. You were never really mine. Now I'm closing my book to find another story to tell. Goodbye my friend I wish you well. Hope you die and go straight into my hell: the one I lived in for so long.  You will be right where you belong. I'll find my way into a happy life. One day I'll be someone's beautiful wife. While your in your hell I'll be above receiving so much love and grace, you'll never get to see another smile on my face! There is no coming back for me I won't even blink an eye. You had your chance and you ruined it for another high; one that's far deeper than me or the love I had for you, but don't worry the streets won't ever love you!

Take it in how ever you want to. I'm gone now these are my final words to you. Take your so called sorries and shove them way past the sky. I forgot to tell you, this is my new guy he's writing you this part to let you know, I got her now you can go! Signing off: a man who will love her way past her pain. Oh yeah don't worry you don't need my name!