The way you should be loved

Chapter fifteen

When I woke he had gone. In his place on my pillow was a handwritten note. My boyfriend now ex-boyfriend had left during the night. I picked it up and looked at it. It was smudged as if it was wet. As I read it I realised that he was crying when he wrote it.

Dear Beth,
I am so sorry it's ended this way. I didn't want to
end it this way but God knows what would happen
in a year. I want you to be happy and not be sad
because I'm gone. Nor to be worry that I'm not faithful
towards you when I'm gone. This way we are free in case
something does happen. If not I will see you in a year.
But please don't just wait for me. I will be happy to know
that you are happy with finding someone.

Remember our good times. Cherish those memories of us.
They were the happiest days I had for all those three months.
I am glad I chased you ( in the nicest way of course) at the BBQ
to make you mine. I never wanted Anna only you. It's always
been you. And that's why I do this.

I sit here writing this at whatever time in the morning it is,
watching you sleep so peacefully. I wanna kiss you right now
but if I do I won't let go.

Don't say a word
Don't make a sound
Don't keep in touch
Don't come around
Don't ask me how I'm doing now
Don't think of me
Just fade me out
Forget about me and I'll forget about you

Love always
Jordan xoxoxxxx

I put the note down and cried. I cried for days after that. Everywhere I went reminded me of him. Even work reminded me of him. I think he would come around the corner and lean up against the door of HR. Sharon made me stay with them for longer. But even seeing her and Jon made it worse. Everything made it worse.

Jordan's POV
I woke up in the early hours of the morning after our last day together. I look over and there was Bethan sleeping peacefully next to me. I look at her sadly when I realised I shouldn't really be here as I broke off our relationship last night. What a big doofus, I even did it during sex. I remove the bedsheets from me as I got up. I feel cold as I'm butt naked still. I find all my clothes from last night. I was trying so hard to do this in the dark. I failed as I stubbed my big toe on a chair.

"Oww". As I pick up my foot nearly falling over backwards doing so. That would be embarrassing as I was still nude.

I carefully and quietly sit down on the chair and dress. While doing so I glance around the room for any of my stuff that I have left. Using the torch on my iPhone I pick up what's mine. I leave a t-shirt on the floor for Beth. I walk out of the bedroom to check around the place. I put all my stuff in a box which I leave by the door. The tears are now flowing down my face as I look for some paper to write on. I try to be a man by wiping my tears away but it doesn't and they flow quicker and faster. I become a blubbing idiot choking on my sobs. Once I finished my note to Bethan I walked back into her bedroom and placed it on the pillow I just slept on. I look over at her again sleeping so soundly.

" I'm so sorry, Bethan. But this is the best way for both of us to be happy". I wiping the tears from my eyes.

I move over to her being careful not to wake her. I leant over and kissed her on the forehead then on her nose and finally moved to kiss her on the lips. I gave her a proper one. I hope I don't wake her up as it's going to harder to leave her. After a while, I left picking up my box of stuff and walked out the door never looking back still sobbing my heart out.

Later I was at the airport with my family, hugs and tears. My mom wouldn't let go. Either would my sisters.

" Really son, don't you want to work" asked my dad.

"No, not yet, ".

" I want you to stay here and work for me".

"But you only want me to work so I can learn the company and to be able to take it over in a few years. I want to have fun. I don't want the pressure" I replied "Please dad. Not yet".

" But".

"No. I don't want it. I don't want the pressure".

" Where is Bethan?" replied Sharon.

"I..." I looked away as the tears formed again in my eyes.

"Why isn't she here?".

I covered my face with my hands. " I broke up with her".

"Why?" She asked, "What happened?".

" I thought it would be best since I am gone for a year. Who knows what will happen in a year".

"Oh Jordan" she replied hugging me. The tears flowed more frequently now.

"Are you sure about this".

" Yes, I am" as I wiped the tears away and then righten the huge rucksack on my back. It had the essentials I needed for my trip as I didn't want to get too much. As I hugged my family again, over the intercom.

Now boarding flight AA517 to London Heathrow.

"Take care little brother".

" Hey I'm not little anymore I'm taller than you".

"Not me" replied Jon "But please look after yourself".

" I will".

"Let me know if you need more money, son".

" I'm fine. I will be fine".

"We know you will. Have fun. I want you to call and write to let me know you are alright" said mom.

"I will". I hold onto the straps of the bag. I look at my family one more last time. " Bye. I miss you all already".

"We do too".

" I guess this is it". I smile one last time before I turn and walked off towards the new chapter of my life. A chapter I want not one that my dad wants of me. I am nowhere near ready to take over a company. I just graduated from college. I have my whole life ahead of me. I was still thinking as I walked away from my family towards the plane. They started to disappear into the crowd as I walked further away from them. Towards my new chapter of finding myself they say.

A/n There it is. Jordan is gone for the year. How is he going to cope? How is Bethan going to cope?