Orange

Twenty-Five

I didn't have the courage to tell Orion.

He was entirely exhausted once our shift was over, sweating up a storm with a flustered smile on his face. I forced a laugh when he joked about his exhaustion. He could tell. I could feel him watching as we hopped onto the bus to go home, but I refused to look him in the eyes.

I couldn't relieve through that experience again.

The whole week passed us by, and I braced for the agony that would come with every passing day. Orion seemed so overjoyed to finally be able to hold my hand, to give me loving kisses on the lips without having to hide his blushing expression. And with every smile he gave me, the knife wedged in my heart twisted violently. It was as if I had shrunk to the size of a penny, trying in vain to catch up to him as he began to blossom into a more confident person. My stomach gurgled and gargled from the constant anxiety. It wasn't long before I started throwing up my dinner the moment Orion fell asleep. I just needed to feel something other than this.

Sunday rolled around, and I didn't get a bit of sleep the night before. I simply stared up at the ceiling as I listened to Orion occasionally stir in his sleep, muttering my name a couple times before turning over.

Eventually, my alarm went off. I slapped my hand on my phone and rubbed my eyes, listening to Orion push himself up on his elbows before leaning over to give me a groggy kiss on the cheek.

"Mmmornin', Sweetheart," he muttered.

I hummed in response. Orion got up, looking down at me for a moment before walking into the bathroom. We moved on tiredly through our morning routine, eventually getting dressed in some decent enough clothes to go to brunch with Sandra (I had asked Orion earlier in the week—he was more than happy to accompany me). It felt like the morning just passed me be. One minute, I was still rubbing the tiredness from my eyes; the next, I was sipping on coffee in the middle of a quaint little café. We sat in the far back, in a cute brown and beige booth with a very floral aesthetic going on all around us. The coffee was to die for, and I very quickly found myself ordering a second cup when Sandra placed a hand over mine.

"You know, Clementine," she said, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. "We've worked together for almost three years, now, and yet, after all this time, we're just barely getting to know each other. You must think I'm stuck up or something."

"No, no, it's fine," I waved away her comment, "I don't think that."

Sandra chuckled, seemingly satisfied with my answer. She glanced towards Orion, who was silently working on a cheese Danish I had ordered for him.

"So, how long have you two been seeing each other?"

Orion smiled, wiping a few crumbs from his face as he glanced over towards me.

"Just a couple of weeks."

"It's gotta be rough, being two Blanks in a relationship. The two of you against the world—it's so romantic."

Orion laughed at this. I just sipped at my coffee.

"But," she lowered her voice a bit, "are you guys sure that you can handle it? I mean, it's kind of a big deal. Won't your daddy be a bit upset when he finds out?"

I knew that she was talking to Orion when she said that last line. I could see him out of the corner of my eye; he shrugged, crossing his arms with that simple smile of his.

"So what? He's made it clear that he doesn't really care about my actual feelings, so why should I care about his? Besides—nothing's gonna keep me and Clementine apart while we still feel the way we do about each other."