loop ||•annyeongz•||

chapter 7

Day 4

Sunlight peeks in through the translucent curtains and the cool spring breeze intrudes the dimly lit room through the half opened windows. Yujin fluttered her eyes open. It was certainly bizarre, waking up to the silence of the morning rather than to her blaring alarm. She sat up slowly, supporting her body with her elbows only to feel a sharp pain pierce through her head.

She clutched her head and quickly reached for the little bottles of pills from the nightstand. She took one with a blue label and twisted it open, only to find it empty. Yujin cursed under her breath. She must've forgotten to restack them. Afterall sh hadn't had these head splitting headaches in forever.

Yujin attempted to climb out of her covers. She needed to get those damn pills from the nearest pharmacy or this stupid headache was going to split her head into two.

Her body, however failed to coperate with her wishes and her stomach begins to churn. She is suddenly met with a newfound nausea that burns her insides and tightens her chest. And Yujin finds herself running to the bathroom, crouching down to empty all contents of her stomach into the toilet bowl.

She's gagging now, one of her hands holding onto the side of the bowl for support and the other holding up her hair lest it gets caught in the mess. Her throat burns and the uncontrollable urge to discharge every substance inside her stomach make her spill her guts out even  more.

Disgusting.

Yujin wipes the corner of her mouth slightly with the back of her palm after throwing up everything. She leans onto the wall adjacent to the toilet bowl and sits there, clutching her stomach.

Her breathing became more laboured and her sight becomes a little blurry, almost as if she had suffered a concussion. Except that she hadn't and Yujin recalls  the last time she had these symptoms. It has been months now and she honestly thought she was doing better. Until she stopped going to therapy, that is.

Right. Therapy.

Yujin also recalls the last time she went to therapy. It had been quite a while and she could not remember well.

She sat there curled up on the cold floor of the bathroom for minutes before ultimately pulling herself up, albeit her legs being a little wobbly. She was running out of pills, she had retreated to her sickness and Yujin knew exactly where she had to go.

The loop can wait. My sanity cannot.

___________________________________________

Yujin grimaced at the generic stench of the hospital hallways. Faint smell of medicine and all sorts of sickness intruded her nostrils and she almost wanted to gag at the metallic sensation. Yujin had never been fond of hospitals.

She saw the sign of the psychology department displayed in bold letters and proceeded straight to the reception. The lady behind the counter did not seem to be enjoying her job either. She simply spoke in a monotonous manner and did not bother to look at the patients.

"Appointment?"

"Not really."

"You can go wait in the line then."

Yujin strutted to the hallway of the psychology department, feeling lifeless in the equally lifeless atmosphere. She sat down on one of the chairs, waiting for her turn. The sight of mentally ill people made her realise that she was not so different from them and that she had come there for the same reasons.

She sat scrolling through her social media, bored after a few minutes of waiting in silence. There was nothing interesting on the internet too. The world has become monotonous, she thought.