The Firefly Field Theory

|12| Don't You Dare Laugh: Part III

PART III:

It’s a busy traffic clogged street, numerous drivers yell at each other in words I don’t understand and honk their vans, cars, motorbikes and trucks, trying to motivate the red light to turn green or possibly out of boredom. I spot donkeys strapped in leather and bound to worn out wooden platforms on rusted wheels amid the jam, the same herd that contains luxury cars like Mercedes Benz and BMWs. It’s almost like a diversified yet congenial gel of the deprived and the privileged, clots the edges of the intersection, as everybody waits for the light that says; freakin leave already, you messed up nation.

The Sun places a glaze to alight the back of Omi shinny scalp, the same shine is in his deep set little eyeballs when he turns to face us, he rubs his palms and explains the game, “Okay here are the rules; everybody gets to ask one random question from everyone here. The question has to be random, but it should be related to the person being asked. We’ll go from smallest here,” he gestures to Wall-e, “to the eldest,” he points at himself. “That means Wall-e, Sam, Bravo, Z and them me. The answer has to be satisfactory.”

The traffic light finally switches, and there’s the noise of multiple engines rumbling to life like an angry swarm of monster bees. Z changes gears, and accelerates along with the now motile traffic herd. I notice impatient motorbikes zip and zoom through every space they can find between cars and vans. Z starts with his random question for   Wall-e, “I’ve been thinking about this for quite some time now Wall-e, but I never got around to asking you. I’m glad I got this chance to ask you buddy. Be honest okay, where are you at in MPO?”

“And what’s that?” I ask.

Wall-e perks up, colliding with Bravo a little and blurts, “Metal Gear Solid: Portable Ops, a game I am married to these days.”

The nonsense that comes as a package deal with Z has once again tremendously disappointed me; I should be used to his idiotic ways but alas, the surprises that come from him are boundless and variant.

“I’ve got outa jail with Roy and then Para-Medic and Sigint show up when I’m contacting Zero, and they tell me that Zero and I are being charged for treason and the rebellion is lead by this guy named Gene, and I need to find and apprehend the guy before it’s too late.”  Wall-e replies without taking a breath.

“That’s so cool, good luck with catching Gene, say my name before you land a bullet in his skull, the bastard trying to sabotage Naked Snake!” That was the question. That was the answer. I’m so disappointed that I choose to ask next, to show Z how it’s really done. “Okay, my random question is what was the biggest life changing incident you’ve come to face?”

“That’s a pretty good question.” Z remarks, “Why didn’t I think of that?”

Because you don’t do the act called thinking, especially before speaking. Wall-e takes a deep breath, then he sits up to face me, and it looks kinda awkward because I’m facing straight ahead. So I sit up to face him too but then it looks more awkward courtesy of the statue of Bravo in between us. It looks like she’s telling us something interesting enough for both of us to sit drawn up over her, when in reality she is rock stiff, “It was the worst month of my fifteen years of personhood, Annie was on a Flame murdering rampage and I couldn’t sleep at night.”

“Oh boy.” Z exclaims.

“No interrupting, okay?” Wall-e snaps, “There were so many things that happened in that month, God help me. THE MOST WORST DAYS OF MY LIFE! Wake up for school–Flame is floating upside down dead in the bowl, go to the kitchen to get some water–another Flame is floating dead inside the bowl, go get dad a toothpick from the kitchen table–another freakin Flame is floating upside down in the bowl.”