The Player and The Freckled Girl

Why do the people with the kindest hearts experience so much pain?

The end of the day comes around quickly and I find myself being forced back to Alex's house since she won't let me go back home, and in her words 'be face to face with a bloody psychopath' so I leave my bike locked up and climb into Alex car.

"what are we going to say to your mom Lex, I can't go telling her it was a biking accident she's a nurse, there's no way she'll fall for that," I say shifting in my seat to try and find a more comfortable position

"Good thing you're not going to lie about it then," She says and I whip my head in her direction not sure I've heard her right.

"what! Alex, I'm not telling Pam that I get beat up at home!" I say to her in shock

"You need to tell an adult Dan! God forbid if something bad happened to you an adult needs to know" Alex shouts in protest

"No! I'm not saying anything! I'll get sent away Alex, they'll put me in the foster care system and then I won't be able to find out who killed my dad! I need to know who did it" I shout back

"I know that Dan and I want to find out just as much as you but I can't keep seeing you like this, it's killing me," Alex says, chocking on her words at the end

I don't say anything back and instead, lean into my seat and look out of the car window. I guess I never really thought about the effect it's having on other people. I'd always gone through it alone patching myself up after nights of Mick's beatings but there are people in my life who really care about me, I just don't know how to let them in yet.

"Look Dan" Alex sighs out, parking her car in the driveway and turning to look at me

"I can't force you to say anything, at the end of the day it's your life but I really really hope you will talk to my mom about it. She won't make you do anything you don't want to do and she won't go to the police she's seen first hand that sometimes that's the worst thing you can do" Alex says looking across at me

"i don't know how to do it Lex," I say and lean my head back closing my eyes to stop the tears from spilling

"do what Dan?" Alex whispers putting a hand on my arm

"open up, tell someone about it all, I've always closed myself off to everyone that tried to get close and now I feel like I've finally got a family again but I'm scared, once I let someone in that's it, they can break me down again," I tell Alex a few tears slipping down my cheek, running into the cuts that litter my face.

"that's no way to live, you have to open your heart back up again, let it be loved, let it be broken, but it all builds you to be a stronger person. If you never let anyone in you can't grow and move on from the past." Alex tells me and I know she's right

"ugh why is everything you say always fucking right" I laugh out as we both sit in the car wiping away our tears

"it's my speciality Parker," She says getting out the car as I follow behind her

"I'll be with you every step of the way," She says grabbing my hand and squeezing it tightly as we stand in front of her door for a second.

"Okay, all I'm doing it, I'm telling Pam" I breath out to myself.

Alex opens the door and we can hear Pam talking with Emelia in the kitchen talking about something that happened at school today. I nervously trail behind Alex as she turns to give me a sympathetic look.

"Hey mom, we're home!" Alex calls out

"Hey guys! How was you're day at sch- DAN!" Pam shouts, dropping the plate she's holding and gasping at my face.