imessage | c. hood

two

iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: what do you call a fake noodle?

unknown: another joke? okay go ahead

me: an impasta

unknown: very funny, who is this?

me: your mom

unknown: joy?

me: yea be joyful towards me, i gave birth to you

unknown: ha. haha

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: whats brown and sticky?

unknown: mud

me: a stick

unknown: are you gonna do this everyday?

me: maybe

unknown: please stop

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: what did the police officer say to his belly button?

unknown: not sure, what?

me: you're under a vest

unknown: can you at least tell me your name

me: aurora

unknown: like the disney princess

me: no she was named after me

unknown: uh huh

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: why do some couples go to the gym?

unknown: to get stronger

me: because they want their relationship to work out

unknown: nice one aurora

me: whos that

unknown: you??

me: oh yeah

unknown: im malcum

me: thats a strange name

unknown: how?

me: cum

unknown: alright stop it

me: just saying

unknown: where do you live?

me: earth

unknown: ...

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: when does a joke become a "dad joke" ?

malcum: idk

me: when it becomes apparent

malcum: such a kneeslapper

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: why is peter pan always flying?

malcum: because hes weird

me: because he neverlands

malcum: don't you have school

me: don't you have a life

malcum: no

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: malcum

malcum: yes?

me: you know about bands?

malcum: ...yeah

me: me and my friends are in a band

malcum: really?

me: it's called duvet

malcum: duvet?

me: we're a cover band

malcum: -.-

me: get it
me: hahaha

malcum: i thought you were being serious, bye aurora

me: bye

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: what do you call a guitar player with no girlfriend?

malcum: me

me: homeless

malcum: close enough

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iMessage
Today 4:44 PM

me: why did the coach go to the bank?

malcum: to get his quarterback

me: ...

malcum: what?

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iMessage
Today 4:45 PM

malcum: hey where's my daily dad joke?

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iMessage
Today 4:47 PM

malcum: aurora?

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Calum5SOS tweeted: missing a girl right about now... :(