If marriage is in our future,
I'm sorry in advance,
because I know you want your kids
to have the childhood you had.
But I'm afraid of what will happen
if I end up like my parents.
Good thing my ovaries will probably
never give me the chance.
Maybe we'll figure it out
when we get a bit older
and leave this shitty southern town
for a place that's a lot colder.
Because you hate the heat.
I love it. Though, I guess
my love for you is greater.
All I need to be warm
is your head on my shoulder.
This world was never kind to us.
Life started as a war.
Sometimes I forget
What we're even fighting for.
Is it the shitty trends we use
to pressure kids into growing up,
or the college experience
that isn't worth experiencing.
I'd lose my mind in this world
if you hadn't kept yours.
I want to run away with you
and forget about our parents,
but how could I ask you to leave
when your family is so important?
I'd be lying if I told you
my family was the same.
Content, civil, and kind,
we're all closer than ever.
but at this point we know
our hostility will always be apparent.
But if my ring size ever matters
and you think about our future,
I'm sorry if you end up
seeing my scars from old sutures.
You know I was destructive
with the self put in front.
Nothing changed since we met,
except everything's different.
The bad things multiply,
and the good seems to be fewer.
I'm not good at giving proper apologies
when apologies are due.
I end up saying "I'm sorry"
when I haven't even done wrong by you.
My childhood was different
not better but not worse.
Just a broken kid replacing cracks
with too much glitter glue.
Maybe I'm thinking too far forward
with too many things to think about.
I can only cross my fingers and pray
that I don't shut you out.
My reputation's gonna outlive me
if I keep hurting the people I love.
So I'm sorry and I promise
that I'm all in, no doubt.
