It had been about a month and a half since the attack. Master Luen had informed all the Starks that Sansa may be starting to recover physically but that it would take a long while before she even resembled her former self mentally, he had also warned that it may not ever happen. Sansa seemed to be remembering a lot of what happened previous to being attacked , but she did not remember the details of the attack and could not name her attacker. The Master and Sam had both said that this was a way for the brain to protect Sansa from dealing all at once with what she had gone through, it was a way for her to process slowly what had happened. They warned the family not to push her and to let her make progress at her own pace. They advised them to just listen and be there when she needed.
This of course proved too much for Robb and Arya. Robb and she both would become so agitated and emotional at seeing their sister , that Sansa felt slightly uncomfortable in their presence . They were trying too hard to make everything right in Sansa's opinion and in her mind and heart she knew that nothing would ever be right again. Theon was trying to be a good distraction and he did come every day to visit Sansa but she was placid even when he told his wildly inappropriate stories and jokes , she did try to smile once in a while because she knew he was trying . She did not know Roslin as she had just been married to Robb for less than a year and the attack happened almost immediately after she had returned to Winterfell. Roslin was trying, she was a sweet girl ; however , Sansa just felt distance from her goodsister. Roslin also had many duties to fulfill being the Queen and that left her little time to just sit by Sansa's side.
Catelyn was always there , even if Sansa wanted her to be or not . The first month she had been in Catelyn's chambers , but after that Sansa wanted to be moved to her own chambers . She had wanted to start to be alone a bit , after all nobody could be with anyone 24 hours a day.
Sansa had started to recover physically little by little . She had begun to walk with a cane but her arm was still immobilized so she still had a hard time feeding herself. Luckily , Jon had taken to coming to have breakfast with Sansa every morning and supper in her chambers every evening , if Sansa was having a hard time he would feed her and was patient . He never became frustrated or let her get too frustrated with herself and her own progress. That relieved Catelyn of some of her duties and gave her a break during the evening . Jon was not intrusive , even though they had not been particularly close as children , Sansa knew she was safe with him . He was calm and she felt completely at ease around him in a way she did not feel with the others. He did not expect anything from her . He was a relief from expectations and from being alone with her thoughts . They had slipped into an easy camaraderie.
Jon was knocking on her door.
Sansa : Come in .
Jon : Hello my Lady , how has the day been ?
Sansa : { Smiling } Good , I walked to the kitchen by myself today with just the cane. It was quite the adventure . Theon and Arya came to see me this afternoon they both told jokes that I can't repeat .
Jon : I see thats good . Seems like you had a full day.{ Smiling back at her}.
Sansa: I think my eye is healed as well , I feel like I can see normally now with the right eye . That makes walking a bit easier , less bumping into things.
Jon: That's wonderful . It's a lot of progress you know . You will be up and on your horse in no time .
Sansa : { Looking hesitant} . Maybe. What have you got there ? { looking at the little plate Jon had brought in }
Jon : I had asked the cook to make lemon cakes for you , she did tell me that you had made an appearance in the kitchen but did not ask for anything special , so I took the liberty of asking for you .
Sansa : Thank you , that is very thoughtful of you Jon. I did not want to burden them more than I already have . They have had to make special soups and broths and I'm not sure what else the last few weeks of my recovery , and then also do their normal duties . I just did not want to add to their workload.
Jon: { looking at her softly } Sansa you are not a burden , on anyone , you must know that .
John sighs . A few seconds pass.
Sansa: {looking down whistfully} I am , I have taken so much your time Jon when you should be doing other things . I'm sorry for being so needy . I'm sorry for a lot of things . I promise I'll try to take up less of your time . I should be able to feed myself soon , I just feel so self conscious being fed in the main hall . As soon as I can do that I won't bother you anymore .
Jon : { lifting her chin up to meet his eyes} . Whatever gave you the idea that you are bothering me or that I did not want to spend that time with you ? I rather enjoy our breakfast and evenings together .{ Chuckling} How else would I get out of spending more time with Robb than I already do ? You provide a respite for me my Lady, after a long day. I look forward to our morning and evenings together .
Sansa : Truly ?
Jon : Yes truly ! I feel like we have to make up for all the time that we ignored each other as children ! { Laughing }
Sansa: I never ignored you , you were always too busy with Arya and Robb. You never had time for me !
Jon: Ok then , let me make up for it .
Jon and Sansa take their supper together . Jon tells her about his day and all the petty squabbles between the Lords, Sansa gives him some sage advice on dealing with all the bickering , she explains that she learned a lot of the politics of court while in Kings Landing . Jon is impressed at her ideas and tells her so . She seems pleased that she can be helpful to him. Jon then asks if she remembers anything . She hesitates but then says no . He doesn't want to push her so he lets the subject drop . She will tell him when she is ready . Jon has some idea of who is behind it , but without proof their hands are tied . Jon and Robb both suspect this abduction was related to something to do with the Crown rather than anything related to Sansa directly . It kills Jon to think that this could all have been because of a grudge against the Crown and that Sansa was the one that had to pay for it .
Jon asks if she would like to sit by the fireplace and read for a bit . Sansa nods . He helps her up and helps her walk and gingerly places her on the large chair placed in front of the fireplace and tucks the furs around her . Jon reads to her until it looks like she is going to doze off .
Jon : Sansa let me help you to the bed .
Sansa : We did not eat our lemon cakes.
Jon : Oh yes let me get them .
Jon starts feeding her . She insists that he take a bite for every bite she takes , he does .
Jon: I think these are the best lemon cakes I've ever had .
Sansa : They are very good , thank you for bringing them . I will be sure to thank Cook once I see her .
Jon help Sansa into her bed and makes sure he puts more logs in the fire and tucks her in . He leans down and gives her a long kiss on the forehead . Sansa, without thinking grabs his hand and kisses his knuckles .
Sansa : { softly } Goodnight Jon .
Jon :{ softly } Goodnight Sansa.
Jon leaves , after he closes the chamber door he stands there for a few seconds to ponder what just happened.
Sansa wonders why the room feels so cold the instant Jon left even though the fire is roaring and she is under the furs . She falls asleep with that thought running round and round in her head.
