Sansa is stunned , she doesn't fully grasp what Catleyn has just told her . She was raped and she is pregnant . She did know that she was violated , but some part of her did not want to acknowledge or accept what had happened. It had been blocked out . Like it had happened to someone else and she was just a spectator. In her more lucid moments she knew what had happened to her , but she thought the best thing was not to think. Just pretend nothing happened and it would go away. But now she can't do that she has to decide what to do because there is a life growing inside her . It's too much , she can't think , she can't feel ,she can't move . She is frozen as if in a trance.
Two days have passed and it seems to Catleyn that her daughter has accepted what has happened. Catleyn tearfully tells Sansa why she did not give her the moon tea as Robb had ordered . She also tells her daughter that she should do whatever she feels is right , that nobody would force her.
She tells Catelyn to leave that she just needs to be alone . Catelyn reluctantly leaves because she does not want to do anything that would upset Sansa. She does leave the handmaiden with her and warns her to keep close watch on Sansa and not let her out of her sight .
She can't stand it anymore she has to get out ,she needs to breathe she feels like she is drowning , suffocating . She starts hyperventilating and the maid run to find the master .
Sam comes in and by that time Sansa has calmed down a bit . Jon is with him . Jon had faithfully come in every few hours with some excuse to check on her, feed her something, or walk with her since she got the news .Sansa has not spoken to him about any of it , she had barely spoken a full sentence since Catleyn had told her everything . Sam had told Sansa of all her options , Sansa said simply that she needed to think.
Sam : I think you're ok , just try to relax and rest that is the best thing that you can do for yourself right now.
Jon: Thank you Sam , I will stay with her .
Sam nods and leaves .
Sansa : { Looking at Jon} May we talk?
Jon : { He sits down and pulls up a chair in front of the chair that she is seated in } Of course you have my undivided attention.
Sansa : { looking down at her hands that are folded in her lap} I can't do it , I can't go through with it . I have been trying to convince myself , but I can't . I keep going over everything nonstop over and over . I can't do it . I can't kill this child , no matter what I know there is a life inside me , I can't kill it . No matter how it was conceived , it's innocent . I can't kill an innocent .{ she has tears in her eyes}
Jon : { he takes her hands in his } Alright , no one will force you , you have my word . I will not let anyone touch you or this babe inside of you . { He kisses her knuckles} . You have my word. {He reiterates.}
Sansa : { in a whisper , tears rolling down her face} Can you tell them Robb , Arya , mother everyone ? I can't face them . I just can't right now.
Jon : Of course . Of course I will. { they stay there for a few long minutes } You're brave , gentle and strong . I know you don't believe this but everything will be fine . { He get up and kisses the top of her head } . Let me get us some food , we will have our supper together . I will be back in awhile . Alright ?
Sansa: Alright .
Jon leaves her solar and and steps out into the hallways . He rests himself up against the wall and lets out a long sigh. He knew in his heart that Sansa would not take the moon tea , even though that would have been the easier road for her . He feels immensely proud of her for being so brave as to make this decision with the knowledge that she would have a very difficult life ahead of her regardless of her station in life. He wonders if this is how his mother had felt being alone? He's not comparing Brandon to the man who raped Sansa, but his mother did have to birth him by herself . Yes , Brandon was his father but he had not married his mother and she had been alone . Jon thinks now this baby will be raised as the next Bastard of Winterfell, but it will be much worse because his father had at least been Brandon Stark. No , he decides Sansa's situation is much worse , she's been violated . No matter what Brandon had not forced himself on his mother . Sansa will need as much love and support as she could get. The first thing he had to do was talk to Robb.
