Howling at the Moon

16. An Exchange

Today of all days had to be one were the Hufflepuffs are hosting a secret house party. It couldn't have been yesterday of course, Diondre was in good spirits yesterday.
It had to be the day Remus shut her down and humiliated her, worst of all she was sure the whole school had heard him, it wasn't exactly discreet. She had only been playfully flirting with him as she always does when he shut the classroom door with a fury and shouted at her for inappropriate behaviour. He's shouted at her before but this was so much different. Diondre felt he really was angry with her.

He called her a whore.
And the whole corridor heard. Of course her fellow Hufflepuffs have been trying to cheer her up, saying they know she meant nothing by it, she's like that will all the teachers. Even Severus sometimes. And there's no way in the world she really means it if she flirts with that greasy demon. Professor Lupin just wasn't used to it that's all, being a new teacher and all. But Diondre knew differently, it really did hurt. Almost as much as his face when she slapped him she was sure, her one triumph of the day. However that was quickly swamped the the insanely loud music coming from the common room.

She tried putting a pillow over her head to drown them out, the only effect it had was leaving her light-headed. Then she tried to sufacate herself with it thinking that would do the trick. Dying by pillow is much harder than the movies imply. Eventually Diondre had enough. She got up not bothering to throw a jacket over her pajamas and rushed out of Hufflepuff.

Like many of the choices she has made today, she regretted it almost immediately. It was freezing and she didn't know where to go.

Her feet grew a mind of their own as they took her to the astronomy tower. She shivered as she walked, speeding up her pace and rubbing her arms to fight the chill. When she arrived she slid herself down the wall to stupor in her self pity.
As it turns out it is the perfect place to escape to. The stars were bright tonight, not a cloud in sight, which meant it was ice cold. For this sight however, Diondre thought was worth suffering for. Remus was still very much on her mind, there was sure to be a repercussion for her slapping him, it was quite out of character for her, but so was his derogatory language so she felt he deserved it.

The echoing sound of footsteps took her out of her reverie, the night of course, could only get worse, she was to be caught out after curfew. Apparently that wasn't bad enough, those footsteps belonged to very man that had her in such a tiff.

____

Diondre shivered as his warm hand left her neck, leaving her exposed to the draft in the castle. Remus saw this and grew concerned despite the telling off for her he had devised. They'd just made it to his office.

"Here you can borrow my jumper, I'm sorry I don't have any in better condition" he smiled apologetically, handing her a jumper that had been draped over his chair. His hand flinched a bit when it brushed hers as she reached for it.

The jumper was brown with wear, tatted on the sleeves with little moth holes. It covered her wrists and the seams for the shoulders were half way down her arms, made from the softest fabric. She loved it and had absolutely no intention of returning it. She'd buy him a new one next hogsmade trip, tomorrow. The jumper made her feel small, mentally as well, all she wanted was to hide in the sleeves and sleep.

"As you very well aware Miss Gargoyle, students aren't meant to be out of their dorms at this time." He grabbed her shoulders and bent his head to look her in the face properly. It might not have been the best choice for his self control, to be eye level such resounding dark eyes. The kind of dark and mysterious eyes that pull you into their depths in a heartbeat if you're not careful.
" So unless you give me a good reason we may have to find a suitable punishment for you, I feel like Hufflepuff can't afford to loose more points as it is." Remus's voice was soft, and nothing like the strict reasonable voice he intended. All he wanted to do was hug the girl, she looked so tired, so forlorn and so go damn adorable in his jumper that was normally too big for him. He noticed a little food stain on the hem and hoped she wouldn't see it and judge him too harshly.

Diondre slouched against the wall, she couldn't tell him she left to escape the Hufflepuff party in her dorm, she would get the whole house into trouble. She also couldn't tell him she was crying because he called her a whore. She was made of stronger stuff than that, as far as he had to know anyway. Thinking back on it she really should have just sound proofed the dorm and went to sleep. The sky had been beautiful though, for those short seconds she had to enjoy it.

"My mind was too restless to sleep, thought if I was to take a walk under this extraordinary sky tonight I could find some peace."

Remus sighed, she was lying. But he took her at her word.

"You get off scott free this time around, don't expect it to happen again mind!" He pointed a warning finger at her. "Now off to bed with you, before you collapse on my floor."

"Do I also get off scott free for smacking you?" She questioned, bringing her hand up to touch the red mark on his cheek.
Remus bought his own hand up to cover hers, he shut his eyes for a second and imagined things could be different. Then he let it all go and pulled over a mask on his expressions.

"No, you'll discuss the nature of your detention with Mr. Filch tomorrow at 8. Go to bed now Miss Gargoyle."

She stood before him for a moment, wanting nothing more than for him to take her into his arms and pull her down by the fire place. But that never happened so she walked out the door with not a word more. Tears stabbing at her eyes for not letting them out.

______

The next morning things had really sunk in. Remus had never been more ashamed. He had called a young girl an awful slanderous name. And it's not like he believed it, if anything he was the whore having his blood rush to his waist at even the sight of her, never mind the things she says to him. He was currently searching through hogsmade looking for an apology gift, nothing seemed quite big enough for all the forgiving she would have to do. As he had decided on a big bag of sweets and was making his way to Honeydukes he spotted a familiar head of brown hair. Having a look around to make sure no one was watching he walked over to peer into the shop window she was standing in. She was staring dreamily up at a dress, a very pretty blue one, running the fabric through her fingers. Remus rather hoped she would buy it, it would look stunning on her. He wondered if she had that kind of money, although simple it looked like it would take up half his pay cheque.

________

Diondre was aware she was a plain girl, there was nothing extraordinary about her features. She didn't mind it that way, she always took a preference for simpler things. Although when a striking girl with vibrant eyes and ruby red lips walks past her being watched by all the boys in the corridor it would on occasion make her feel... not enough.
Diondre made people happy though, she liked that most about herself and it was enough to wish she wasn't someone else.

She looked at the pale blue dress a few moments longer, it would look too ordinary on her. Even if it didn't, where on earth would she wear it? She shook her head to dislodge the dress from it and walked over to the men's jumpers and began flicking through them. There was a brown one similar to the one that now sat in her chest of clothes. Remus always wore brown, besides she wanted to get him something special, not that his behaviour to her should be rewarded... Everything else however made him a good man, the best she had ever met. Her fingers brushed against some soft fabric that left a good feeling all through her body. This one.