Total Drama All Stars

Day 13 (Part 2)

I hate this show.

I know I’ve said this statement countless times during my years I’ve been a part of it, but no, I really, truly, wholeheartedly mean it.

I hate Total Drama.

Why you may be asking? Well aside from the obvious reasons, the tortures we’ve all gone through throughout the years by Chris, fighting with each other, Courtney, Gwen, besides all the usual stuff.

For starters, I got flushed down a fucking toilet. I dreaded that thing with all my heart all season, and actually having to go down it? UGH.

I shudder at the memory and thought of it.

But oh, it actually does get worse than that, I figured the flush would lead me somewhere near home, which after that flush of death, it sounded nicer than any place on earth, even without Duncan there with me.

But no, it lead me to a big holding area with all the other contestants from this season, all except Duncan of course.

I was soaked with toilet water, annoyed I wasn’t home, and had to deal with hearing everybody talk extremely loudly in a small cramped space, it was needless to say I was in a completely shitty mood.

That’s not even the absolute worst part of my day yet. All of us contestants are supposedly up for grabs to help either Mal or Zoey in the finale, but it’s not as simple as Mal or Zoey just tell Chris who they want their helpers to be, no, that’d be too painless for Total Drama.

Total Drama decided to have Owen fill up big bubbles with his farts as air so we’d all be floating above Mal and Zoey so they could shoot us down and pick who helps them randomly.

So yeah, currently, I’m sitting in a big bubble filled with toxic air, holding onto my nose for dear life.

I hate this show.

~

I was actually praying I wouldn’t get shot down. Yes staying in this toxic air bubble of death was also the last thing I wanted to do, but at least in here I’m somewhat safe. God knows what Chris has in store for the finale.

I heard some pops and screams as Zoey and Mike shot some of my competitors down. For a few minutes, I thought I’d really be safe and I wouldn’t have to help either psycho Mal, or Zoey. Even though we made amends, that didn’t mean I was thrilled to go help her in this finale.

Just when I hoped I was about to be released to freedom - pop - I was suddenly airborne and falling straight to the ground, screaming the whole way. “God damn it!” I said in fury.

“Oh wow! In a strange turn of events, Alex gets shot down by both Zoey and Mike at the same time!” Chris narrated.

“No way, I shot her first!” Zoey protested.

“You’re out of your mind honey, she’s helping my team” Mal argued back, lord knows why he wants to be near me; I’d rather be in the stink bubble than help him. Mal and Zoey kept arguing, talking over each other until Chris pushed a button on his megaphone making a screeching noise blow out.

“Enough! I am the host, so I have final say” Chris started, “You both shot Alex down at the same time, we have the play by play if you really want to see. Alex must help you both!”

“What!?” Mal and Zoey said together.

“Ha, yeah, what!?” I said getting my bearings back near everybody. Cameron and Gwen were near Zoey, and Alejandro and Heather were near Mal. Huh, well isn’t this an interesting little group.