Ice Picked Hearts

Chapter-08

Juliet's POV

The drive to my house was more quiet and awkward. I looked like a mess and I couldn't look him in the eyes or speak a word. I'm tired of thinking of who might have pushed me off the stairs. All I demand is rest. I'm tired of this sick day.

I'm happy and grateful for the help Paul had rendered. He packed in front of my house and I hurriedly jumped out of his car. I had little strength in me that I could collapse if I go through another stress, but I don't mind running away from him with the little energy left in me.

He hurried after me but I didn't let him come closer. He stopped right behind me at my door step while I was waiting for my mom to open the door for me to jump in. (I mean crawl in)

"Do you want me to help you in"? He asked softly.

"No...Thank you". A lump formed in my throat.

"Alright, make sure you take medications and don't hesitate to call me when you need me".
"Thank you, but no I won't be needing your help anymore". Just then my mom opened the door and I walked in. "Good evening ma'am". He greeted her but she ignored him. The exact attitude I expect from her towards anyone who treats me bad.

"Jully, how are you? and.....why aren't you at work"?

"I won't be going today, I'm not feeling too well"? I told her. "Okay...huuhh". She looked outside the window staring at Paul in disgust.

"You look like shit, have you been hoeing coz no boy has ever dropped you home"? She finally said. Her question startled me. "I'm not saying is so bad, you know we need the money"

It was obvious that she was on drugs and I won't be having this conversation with her. I turned away from her and went to my room slamming the door shut behind me. Her scream was getting unbearable and I can't be having this conversation with her.

After a while, the house was quiet again. She must have gone to her room, a place she has warned me never to step my feet into.

I took a bath after, having no other plans than to lay in bed for the rest of the day. I checked my phone to see if I got messages. I got a message from Luke, my friend in the junior class and a neighbor too, Katherine, my colleague at work and some others who had something to say about the voice note, but no message from Jewel. That's unexpected.

There came a knock on my door, which could be no other person than my nagging mother. I'm surprised she didn't just badge in.
She opened the door slowly while I pretend to be asleep. "Baby, I'm really sorry". She said softly. After realizing I was asleep she dropped something on my table and rubbed her hand on my forehead.

Soon she left my room, giving me back my privacy. There was a tray of food on my table. I felt a sudden rush of hunger after seeing it.

Just then my door swung open with my mom coming in with some meds in her hand and a glass of water on the other hand. "I thought you were asleep". She dropped the things she had brought for me on my table and sat beside me. She wanted to have a conversation with me, but I don't want to have a conversation with her.

"Mom I'm sorry, can you please leave me alone for now, I'm not feeling too well and I need to think". There was a pause between us. I avoided making eye contact with her.

"I knew I shouldn't have come here, you're just like your father. You never appreciate anything". She spat and left my room slamming the door on my face.

***

"Juliet! Get you ass up right now!" My mom yelled at me. Her noise woke me up from my sleep. "Explain your madness"

"Mom, what are you talking about"? I was confused. "I said it! You've been hoeing... who the hell is the Paul you want to shag so badly that you even recorded it and sent it to the whole school"?

Now I understand where this is coming from. All of a sudden, there was a rush of heat in my ears. "Mom, it's not what you think".

"Don't give me stupid excuses" she snapped back. "I give all I have to you. I've tried to make sure you don't make the same mistakes I made, but you never appreciate my help! You... you came into my life to ruin everything. I can't even have a normal life coz of you!"

"Mom!"

"Let me talk"! She snapped back.
"I mean, what else do you want me to do for you? After your dad left us he never turned back and I didn't abandon you just as badly as I want to. Now, you're going around spoiling my name Juliet, why"?!

"I'm spoiling your name?! You say I'm spoiling your name? Mom it's you who has failed at child upbringing! I've not had a reasonable mother and child conversation with you in years. Mom it's you who won't let me have friends. I'm a laughing stock mom...all because of you!
My reaction startled her. She stared at me in shock.

"No one cares or respects me". The lump in my throat grew bigger while tears rolled down my cheek.

"Every room I walk into, everyone laughs at me and call me names! It's me who is the mature one here! I can't believe you're saying you're trying to help me! You're ruining my life! And yes, Dad made a mistake, a big mistake of leaving me with you".

After saying those hurtful words I know I'd regret later, I left my bed and walked out, saying the last things I know might kill me.

"And what do you call a normal life? Your life?" Scoffs...

"Our lives are ruined coz of you and please stop blaming me for your mistakes".

I felt her eyes on me, but I didn't dare to look back.

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