Loving Ms. Winters

35: Blair's POV

(A/N) WARNING this chapter contains triggering situations involving sexual assault, violence, and abuse.

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~1 Week Ago~

The room was spinning around me but even as I walked it didn't feel real. The lights seemed scattered throughout the air rather than strung along the ceiling like usual but I downed the last of my drink anyway. I dropped my cup mindlessly and shuffled through the crowd before stumbling up the stairs that seemed steeper than Mount Everest to me at the time.

"Hey there." A deep voice said as a figure approached

I looked up recognizing the icy blue eyes of Parker Daniels but my vision made it difficult to process him through the daze I was in.

"Parker," I slurred out happily pulling him into a hug "how have you been bud?"

He chuckled lowly hugging me back a little tighter than I would have liked "I'm a lot better now."

I forced myself out of his arms and looked up at him "Why is that?"

"You're here," he smirked, his eyes seeming to scan me up and down "and looking sexy I might add."

He was close enough to smell the alcohol on his breath but it was mixed in the air with the scent of weed on his oversized black hoodie.

He took a step closer resting his hands on my hips "Let's go somewhere more private."

I shook my head, unable to form words as he started pulling me along with him towards one of the bedrooms. My mind went blank and the room seemed to be spinning faster with every second. The last thing I remember was dropping to the floor and screaming bloody murder, my thoughts incoherent as I felt myself falling deeper into the hole I had spent years trying to escape from.

~4 Years Ago~

Sarah had gone to visit her parents and made Scott stay home with me for the week. I had wanted to go with her but she had insisted that I needed to go to school. Scott hadn't been home until almost ten the first night but when I arrived home from school the second day I was surprised to see his car in the driveway. I made my way inside and found Scott leaning over the counter with a glass of scotch in one hand. It was something I had grown used to living here, he had one in hand almost every time I saw him at home.

"Hey." I said nodding at him as I grabbed a water from the fridge

He looked over at me, his eyes dull "Hey beautiful."

Surprised at his response I sat down at the island across from him "Are you drunk?"

He scoffed at me "That's none of your business."

He finished his drink in one gulp and then absent kindly threw it behind himself towards the sink. Missing by a few feet the glass fell to ground shattering into shards across the floor.

"What the fuck Scott!" I yelled standing up and carefully walking towards the mess

Without getting too close I observed that the glass had covered most of the floor and that the cup was not going to be able to be saved.

"That was my favorite glass you fucking bitch!" He screamed almost stumbling over himself as he moved towards me

I felt my palms begin to sweat and my heart constrict as he got closer. I was frozen in place, unable to even form a coherent thought as I watched him. He slapped me hard causing me to fall back on the ground screaming out as the searing pain soared through me. He kicked me in the ribs as he walked past me and then as if pacing he turned back around and looked down at me. I looked at my torso to avoid his gaze and realised that my shirt had risen up revealing the bottom of my plain black bra. I nervously covered myself taking my eyes off of him long enough not to notice before he climbed on top of me. His weight seemed crushing as he dragged the tip of his cold finger along my cheek looking down at me with his dead eyes.

"Get off Scott." I stuttered out trying to push him away

He pinned my hands to the tile looking down at me with a devilish look "Are you a virgin Blair?"

Tears stung my eyes as I stared at the island unable to even look at him "Yes."

"Ah," he breathed out against my neck making me cringe as a tear ran down my cheek "I can change that for you."

"No Scott." I cried out squirming under him trying to escape

He groaned slightly as though the struggle I was putting up was turning him on and then he grabbed my neck slamming my head back so I looked at him.

He squeezed hard enough that I felt myself suffocating until he released his grip slightly "It'll be our little secret my princess."

~Present~

My head was spinning, my thoughts scattered. I could feel my hand shaking slightly but I couldn't focus enough to process anything around me.

"Blair?" Alice's voice seemed far away

~4 Years Ago~

The darkness of my room surrounded me, I knew the glass was still scattered across the kitchen. The glass was completely broken because of him and it would be almost impossible to pick up all of the pieces. My head still ached like the rest of my body that I felt disconnected from in this moment. I continued staring at the ceiling for five days and I hardly ate a thing in that time. I snuck downstairs for water and a granola bars after two days when Scott was at work and then didn't move for another three. When Sarah got home she was infuriated with me for skipping school.

"Blair come on at least look at me." She yelled throwing her hands up

I looked over at her, my gaze settling on nothing in particular as I spoke for the first time in a week "You weren't here."

Without another word I looked back at the ceiling and blocked out whatever she said next. It took me another week to even get out of bed and almost a month for me to return to school. Sarah thought I was just depressed at the time but she had no idea what really happened that week she left me alone with him.

~Present~

I felt a hand gently caressing my back and I closed my eyes screaming "Don't touch me, please, don't do this, please just leave me alone."

I cried into my knees letting myself accept something I hadn't been able to in four years, Scott raped me.

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