S A R A

Ch 33

33

My excitement carried all the way over into the next night.

Same lips red

Same eyes blue

Same white shirt

Couple more tattoos

I was in awe as I stood by the side of the stage. He didn't even look at me, he was so in the music, so in the moment and I was so,

We're just two ghosts

Standing in the place of you and me

so,

Two ghost swimming in a glass half empty

In love.

The stage was beautiful, the theatre was beautiful, he was beautiful.

Never mind that here was a completely sold out crowd, he was set to play in the same city but in an arena in a year's time.

It was scary to think what would happen in a year's time, again.

Scary and exciting.

I knew I shouldn't but I was already seeing it all in my mind.

Us in a little house, two kids and a dog....

[I snapped out of it.]

Instead, I went around the stage, and decided that I wanted to be in the audience. I doubted anyone would recognize me and I wanted to relish the feeling of being here before...that may start happening.

I quickly and quietly tiptoed down the hallways before Bruce or anyone would say otherwise, and eventually I made it t the back of the auditorium, where everyone was standing. I went around and since I was introduced to everyone before the show and because I had a backstage pass, security let me in into the 'bottle service' area behind the red ropes, at the front side before the stage. It was way less crowded and the view, of seeing Haden was as if it was the first time...

I was mouthing the words to that song, when his eyes caught mine, my heart skipped a beat .

It felt like there was something rising in me, a volcano. He held his eyes on mine for a moment longer than what would be considered proper. And just that moment made this whole night, these months of longing, worth it.

I was beginning to feel embarrassed, us like this in the middle of it all again, but he just smiled for a moment and continued to do his smirk/smile thing even while he was singing. God, I hated him. By hated, I meant loved.

When he got off stage, I was back there again, and before the thousands of people surrounded us, he came directly to me, taller than me, he leaned in close and asked "So, how was it?"

"Haden, that song.." Our summer song.

"I know," he only had time to reply before he was promptly swept away into backstage for after show duties. "Wait for me!" He yelled over his shoulder.

If he only knew, that I'd wait for him forever.

-

As it turns out, it practically was forever, because by the time he came out, changed into his classic black shirt black pants attire with an overnight bag, much of the crew had already cleared out, and I was sitting on the edge of the stage in the middle, wondering what it would be like for all this to be mine someday too.

But I was promptly interrupted by his voice, which I now could recognize anywhere and with my eyes closed.

"I'm sorry. I hate to apologize, but there was just a million things to sign and, well, you know how it is with the album release," he came up from behind, and jumped of the stage expertly.

"I don't mind," I smiled, thinking to myself how I could be so forgiving.

"So," he put his hands on my knees, and lean in again so that our foreheads were touching. The smell of him was almost too much. Only once since I last saw him, a stranger sat beside me on a train wearing the same fragrance and I thought I was going to die. It almost felt so real, I had to turn around to see if maybe he was there. It wasn't exactly he same, but a sort of perverted, sick and sweet torture.

But now, having hime here, again, "yes?" I prompted, though knowing what we were both thinking.

"What'd you think?" He bit his lip. Was he actually questioning himself?

"You know what I think. That was, well, amazing."

"Really?" He asked, genuinely surprised. "You know I was a bit nervous in the beginning," that may have been true but he was still good, "but then when I saw you there, its lie al the nerves had disappeared, and I felt happy. Actually happy, for the firs time in a long time."

I slipped off the stage and whispered in his ear "take me home, cowboy."