Shut Up & Listen

DIDN'T CHA KNOW

Cobe

I swear no one has ever asked me if I was fucking a dude before now. I played it off and stayed cool but that shit was embarrassing as fuck. My sexuality has never been questioned before.

A lot of times I think I should've never started messing with Cole. Ever since I kissed him at that party, I've been making dumb decision after dumb decision. My guard is down and shit keeps happening.

I've been sitting on the kitchen counter for a few minutes just deep in thought. I'm really trying not to beat my self up about how vulnerable and transparent I've become because I knew that shit would happen eventually. But I thought it would be on my own terms. Man, fuck Cole! This shit is all his doing, his damned emotional ass.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't be all up in your business, but are you alright?" Chey interrupted my thoughts from across the room. She's sitting at the kitchen table now.

"I- damn. Uh I'm just thinking."

"About what?"

"I got a lot on my mind. My life is lowkey in shambles right now."

"I know I'm a stranger and all but if u want to vent, I'll listen."

"I wish I could. Like I really wish I could." Like wow, all she did was ask if I'm alright and I'm on the verge of crying. I hate when I get emotional like this dawg. I just feel hella overwhelmed. My life is literally a big pile of shit right now, and nobody even knows. I mean, I've let Cole see a little bit of it, but I don't think he could handle it if I REALLY let him know everything. Shit, I can barely handle it myself.

"What if I share one thing and you match it?"

"Shit, aight deal. But it depends on what you share tho shorty."

"I know, I know... I'll make it juicy."

"Please never say that shit to me again." I said with a burst of laughter. That word makes me hella uncomfortable, especially when a girl says it.

"You nasty!" She said matching my laughter and we laughed for a few more seconds. I pulled out a joint I saved from earlier but just before I lit it, she stopped me.

"You smoke in the house?"

"Well not usually..."

"Oh." She didn't even have to say it, I just put the contents back into my pocket and started playing with my beard.

"Do you wanna go first?"

"Nah shorty. Ladies first."

"Well... I just want to vent right quick but don't tell Cecil that I told you alright?"

"Word is bond." I said with a smile.

"You hella corny." She must've watched the WuTang series too hahahaaaa.

"What? That's what yal say in New York ain't it?"

"Shut the hell up." She tried to keep a straight face but a smile crept across her face.

"But for real. I won't tell him you talked to me."

" Okaayyy. Well...I don't know why I'm here honestly. I haven't seen Cecil in almost two years and out the blue, he wants to take C3 and I on a "family trip". I'm not saying he's a terrible father, but he's really good at disappearing and popping back up."

"Wait, he wasn't in New York?"

"Nigga no! His ass left the damn country. I heard he's got citizenship in some weird ass country in West Africa or some shit. Ain't that a bitch?!"