Growing Close: Tododeku

Part 13: Together

We had finally gotten back to my dorm room, and the air between us was as nervous as ever.

Shouto sat on my bed with his legs crossed and his hands set gentle on his knees. He heaved a sigh, looking down at the ground with apprehension and his muscles released what tension he was holding onto. I did, too, and it seemed that with that the whole mood of the room shifted to a lighter note. I gulped, knowing that must've been my cue to speak.

"I think you've already figured out that I didn't mean it," I said to the silence, knowing he would know what I meant. I was almost sure he hadn't heard me, but he proved me wrong.

"I knew you didn't," he replied blankly. I was almost relieved that hadn't believed me, but I really didn't have any reason to be. I knew he wouldn't have given up on me that easily. "What's that smile for?"

"I'm not smiling," I lied.

He got up smoothly, approaching me with a sort of sashay that could do nothing if not make me laugh. He placed his hands on my waist, no sign of fear in his eyes as he pulled me closer and said, "you're lying, but okay."

I pushed him away just a bit, trying to put enough distance between us that I'd be able to get my thoughts out comprehensibly. "I-I need to actually get my thoughts out before we do anything," I said, a chilling confidence in my tone. He nodded, taking on serious mannerisms as he sat down across from me on the bed, myself still standing in front of him.

I sighed before I began my tangent. "This will probably be sappy, and I'm sorry for that in advance. I-It's just that I'll never be able to get out everything I need to without those bits."

"Okay," he said, affirming the presence of his listening ears.

"Well, you know I'm not leaving you. Though we weren't together in the first place... t-that's not the point. The point is I want to be with you, Shouto, I really do. But I also need to apologize. And I know you have somehow already found it in yourself to forgive me, but I haven't found it in myself to forgive me. Do you understand that?"

He gave me another nod, understanding eyes searching my own.

"That's why I might be reserved in front of others. I know people are already aware there's something between us, but I can't bring myself to be intimate with you when I feel like our relationship doesn't deserve to be as good as it has been, but that's all stupid worries. I-I'm getting off topic... sorry," I said, becoming reserved and lack luster.

"Okay. Continue."

"Right, well, okay. I just... I..." I stuttered out, trying to find my voice and spit out the words I desperately wanted to get out. It wasn't the first time I'd said them, and it certainly wouldn't be the last, but it was difficult non the less. My breath was caught in my throat and my heart was no longer following a normal pattern, and it all beat down on me like every feeling I'd ever felt for him was smacking me over and over with a bludgeon the size of Hagrid. It was so intense it was basically painful, but I struggled out the words non the less.

"I love you." His own breathing seemed to stop, his eyes filling with admiration and hope that I hadn't seen since our first real connection at the sports festival.  

I continued. "I refuse to leave you now that I know that, Shouto, I love you. I need to take it slow, and I'm stubborn as hell, a-and as you would say, my selflessness can be selfishness and I let my anxieties get the best of me a-"

"Stop," Shouto interrupted, "I know your flaws. I love them all, Izuku, cause they make you you. You could have a hundred more flaws and your good traits would still greatly outnumber them. That doesn't matter, though. Just... I love you too." My heart rate sped up at his confession.

"Thank you. For letting me get all that out," I said, nerves leaking from my voice.

"I'm glad you did. I think we could talk about this later, but I'd really just like to hear you say it," he began, grabbing my hands and pulling me closer. "What are we?"

"We're boyfriends, Shouto," my chest flooded with a warm, happy feeling that left me floating. Our lips were coming closer, almost as if my a magnetic force that neither of us could refute with, and we kissed. His soft lips on my caused the fated return of the butterflies, and the kiss deepened the more I thought about our resolution. Still, I pulled away, holding a hand to his cheek and peering at him with an expression that couldn't have portrayed anything but my admiration for him. "We're boyfriends."

~

That weekend, we watched movies all night and day, only leaving my dorm room to grab snacks and have small check-ins with Iida, Uraraka, and Tsu. They were all aware of Shouto and I's "togetherness" after a short explanation from the both of us, and of course, non of them were surprised. When we first revealed it, Uraraka even said, "Finally! I'm glad you two got it all sorted out."

We lied together on my bed, myself positioned against his chest with his arms wrapped around my waist as we watched an anime called "Inuyasha" on a TV that Shouto managed to sneakily get set up inmy room the second I left it to shower on Saturday night, the day after our confessions. I was mad for a moment, but I couldn't be for long. I figured he would be spending a lot of time in my room anyway, so what use was it to fight him over it?

I trapped his hands in mine and held them at my abdomen, his right hand's index finger mindlessly tracing the skin at my waistband. The feeling of his chilling skin against my own made me shiver, but I shivered into his chest, seeking refuge in his left side. He only held me closer, and traced my skin with the barrier of my t-shirt bearing the worst of his winter stricken hand. That small touch made my heart skip beats.

It felt like such a familiar scenario, although I knew nothing of that sort had happened between us before. I smiled and held his had to my lips, placing gentle kisses on his knuckles. Little things like that made me nothing but happy, and it really made me think that that was enough for me. All of the sexual tension that had started us out had nothing on the relationship we had developed up to that point. I guess those sort of domestic love life happenings suited us.

I pulled him close to me in the beginning, so close that we hadn't a bit of sense between us, and I hadn't the slightest intention of letting him go. I wanted to keep him for only devious reasons, but he transformed those feelings into something else. We had grown close--though we were growing ever closer--and I had found that perhaps he'd convinced me to love him, and in the end I in no way detested it. I was happy for everything that had happened in those short few weeks, and it had changed me completely for the better. The cloud of negativity had taken a temporary leave, and that was enough. I felt like it was all coming together.

We were growing close, and I only wanted to pull him closer.

~Fin~

A/N: Hello Lovelies! We're here! It's the end! I'm sorry this is probably a shitty ending, but I just wasn't sure what to do??? Anyway, I tried my best lmao. I hope you enjoyed it. 

Please leave comments and votes and all that! Tell me your opinion, give me pointers or point out little things that I mis-typed, whatever, but communicate with me! I want to get to know all of you people who somehow stumbled upon this mess of a fanfiction. You're all great and I'd love to get to know you, so drop something in the comments or send something in my conversations!

This has been a WILD ride. As my first chapter to chapter fanfic, it was definitely different, but I enjoyed writing it very much and I hope you all enjoyed reading it just as much. Please stay inside and follow your Covid-19 safety guidelines set up in your area! (I know I know repetitive.) Thank you all, and I'll see ya next time <3