The tale of Feawen

Chapter 7- a dance in starlight

I had enough of Thranduil. I had enough of Mirkwood. Right now, I had enough of everything and I just wanted to sleep and not see anything at all.

"Feawen", Legolas said as he wanted to take my shoe. "No! I can go, I dont need to sit. ", I replied. He wanted me to sit on the horse for the next days, but why me? "I can carry the baggage. You are weak." "I am not weak!" What was he thinking? Had he become like his father or what? Just because I am a woman? "The sight of my father is not good for everyone", he went on. "I saw your face. He can control with his words." I sighed. Fine. I got on the horse. That journey would not be as fun as the one before...

At the end of the day, we searched a place to sleep in the woods. When we found a safe place, it was already dark night and I secured Límdú on a tree. I sat down at a rock at the edge of the river. I looked at the stars; The sky was cloudless tonight; all the clouds had flown away.
Legolas sat down at a rock next to me. I thought that I should say something; he had maybe, if he had not said it just like something, confessed that he loved me and that he did not listen to his father. "I.. I have to tell you something", I said, looking at the ground. "I think your father was right", I went on, now looking at him. "I have not yet discovered many abilitys." He looked asking at me. "But some", I said. I began to sing.

It was an old song my mother, who had raised me, had sung to me when I was a little baby; it was a song about the forests and the animals. My voice was light and clear; I had always had a light voice when I was singing. After a few verses, they came. Like when I had been a kid: When I was really young, I had gone into woods and sung, and after a while, many animals of the forest had come; mooses, deers, lots of rabbits, birds, hedgehogs and butterflies. It had been like they understood me; and later, I sung for them many other times.

Now as I sung, it was like in those days; mooses and deers were coming, rabbits were observing me. Legolas did not believe his eyes. He went to one of the deers and caressed it. "How long have you been doing this?", he asked with a sweet, surprised smile. "Since forever", I replied. "And that is not everything." I came towards a deer next to him to caress it. "I can heal them." He was confused, I had to explain more so he would understand. "I have been in the forests very often with Tari. We were discovering all the forests, and one time, we arrived at a glade where we found a dying moose. It had been shoot by orc arrows, five of them. Tari and I could not help it, we tried to pull out the arrows, but it did not have any effect. I began to cry and Tari went angry. Why would orcs shoot animals? I started to sing a lament for the moose; I love animals, it always seemed like they understand me. When I sung, Tari and I saw how the blood on his fur and the holes disappeared. He was healing because of my voice. At first, Tari wanted me to tell everyone, but we decided to keep it as a secret. I did not even know where it came from. But Tari and I went on wandering through the forests and everytime we saw a hurt animal, I sung and healed it. I thought it would heal human beings as well; but if it did, my crown would be shining light by now."

He was voiceless. "Legolas.. will you help me to find out if I can also do anything else?", I asked him. "Feawen. I will help you by heart. But yet your life is a gift."

I ran deeper into the forest, without a reason- I just felt like it. I found a lake- and drowned in old memories. I spun around, danced to an old melody I had once heard in our sea realm- and Legolas watched me with a worried gaze. As I spun around, my gown flew in circles around me, shimmering in starlight. Suddenly, old memories came to my mind- but not just good ones.

"I remember now", I said as I sat down on a tree stump. "What do you mean?", Legolas asked me, sitting down on a tree stump beside me. "Bad things that happened in my childhood", I replied, looking down. "It is so long ago- and anyway, I just remembered it now. In the time Tari and I almost were teenagers, young childs, I got to stay with her in Mirkwood for a few weeks, just to have fun with my best friend. We ran through south Mirkwood everyday, and that was another time I found a hurt deer. It had been bitten by a wolf, I think." Still looking down, I almost forgot someone was beside me. It was like I lived through these old memories again. I went on. "So when I sat myself down to heal it, it suddenly ran away; but it could not, you know? It was not supposed to run because it was hurt and I had to heal it! Therefore I followed it; ran behind it very fast. Tari told me to stop, she followed me with her bow, she repeated her words, but I did not stop. I wanted to heal the deer. We suddenly arrived in a clearing; but it was dark, grey; a fortress stood there, a big, dark fortress, and the deer ran inside. I heard steps behind me, it was not Tari, but I ignored it." I looked up at Legolas to see his reaction. He looked confused but listened to me and I went on again. "I ran into this old fortress, without knowing what it was. I was a child! How should I have known it was Dol Gûldur*?

The deer ran away, now into the forest again, but I did not follow it this time. I had heard noises, weird noises, around me, and underneath me, like from a cave or something. I had no weapon; Tari was outside with her bow. It was orcs who came at me out of nowhere- I ran away to Tari, and seeing the look on her face was terrible; she was so terrified, but still brave as she has always been; she tried to shoot orcs with her bow and succeeded; but it were too many; we ran away, and at the edge of the fortress, an orc hit my head with a sword. It all went by so fast! I just remember the voice of some stranger, some boy, maybe as old as we were that time; I think that he had followed us secretly. I remember Tari holding me in her arms crying when he told her to get me out of there, and she did. But after seconds, I collapsed. The next thing I remember was lying near to a lake, and Tari watching over me. When I woke up, I immediately asked her where the boy was who had saved us, and especially me. She did not say anything; he was so young, so innocent.. I think that he ran away or.. does not live anymore."

I whiped away a tear. "I wanted to thank him. But since he saved me, I have never seen him again." I was so sad; it would have been the best if I had not remembered it, if it had just stayed at the back of my head. That boy had maybe died because of my stupidity, and I could never forgive myself for that. Tari and I had never talked about it again. Legolas, who had been totally quiet the whole time, now surprisingly said: "Yes you have." Wait- what did he mean? But no, could it be? Before I could have asked him, he went on. "He did not get hurt or ran away. He called guards of his father who fighted the orcs and tried to help them as well. He did want to find you and Tari, but his father did not allow him to search for you." I was confused. "Thranduils guards?", I questioned. "Yes", he replied and when I realised, I immediately hugged him tight;  I thought the boy had died! But without my knowledge, he had been by my side already all the time. "I am so glad! And I am so sorry I was so stupid! I brought you all in danger! I did not even remember it!" "I did not know it was you either", he replied. "I had forgotten it. You brought it back to my mind, but that is a good thing."

*= dark fortress