like honey but poisoned

I'll kill you

I didn't sleep well, again I had to deal with the same nightmare. One would think that I might dream about daily experiences or something as banal as that once in a while, but I wasn't blessed with it. My head hurt and I felt exhausted. It was 5 in the morning and I didn't want to go back to sleep to face yet another potential nightmare.
With a sigh, I put on my slippers and bathrobe.

On my way downstairs, I found Malice cleaning one of the hallways.
"Malice, please get me a black coffee to the library."
"Sure, princess. Have you not slept well?"
"Not really."
"Alright, I'll get you a coffee then."
Malice already knew that it was a bad sign, when I was up so early.

Once I was in the library, I continued reading "Call Me By Your Name". I liked to be in the library, because I craved its calm atmosphere.
Malice brought me my coffee, without saying a word, she knew I actually wasn't a morning person, so she usually avoided conversation.
Just when I had managed to relax a bit, I was interrupted, by another maid whose name I kept on forgetting, in my head I always called her "Blondie".
"Princess, I am so so sorry to disturb you, but Chief Inspector Montgomery is at the door and I wasn't sure, whether I should wake your aunt or not and-"
By holding up my hand, I signalled for her to stop talking. Blondie always talked too much for my liking.
But did she say Chief Inspector Montgomery? I hadn't heard from him since my parent's death, which was about 4 months ago.
"Uh, no, no don't wake my aunt, I'm sure she's still pretty hungover from yesterday. I'll go talk to him myself, thanks, uh...."
"Monique, princess, that's my-"
"Yea, whatever."

By the time I reached the doorway, my heartbeat sped up and I felt awful.
"Good morning Chief Inspector."
"Good morning, princess,"
His old eyes were as opaque and bitter as I felt.
"I'm sorry to disturb your calm morning."
By the look he gave me, I could tell that he meant it.
"The news I have for you aren't good ones, may I come inside?"
I started shivering, but not from the cold, I was scared.
Slowly I nodded.
"Sure, Chief Inspector, come in."
I told Malice to make us some Lissa tea, as I had no interest in waking up anymore, I needed something to calm down.

"So, we've found important evidence on who is responsible for the death of your parents."
"O-okay. Who?"
My hands were shaking so much now, that the spoon was clinking against the tea cup.
"We have reason to assume that the Crimson kingdom is involved in the murder."
"B-but how? We've sworn to live peacefully side by side....I-I don't understand...."
He looked to the floor, like he felt sorry for telling me.
"I know, it's a big shock. But the knife that was used to cut off the heads of your parents had a unique blade, a blade which can only be found in the Crimson castle."
"Oh God...."
By now my tea cup had fallen to the floor and broken into pieces.
"I'm sorry to tell you these unsettling news."
"No, no, it's okay, I mean, I'm okay, for God's sake, I'm okay!" I rather tried to convince myself than him.
"Marie, it's okay to be scared of this, even I am scared," he admitted truthfully.
Sometimes he called me Marie, but I was okay with it, as he had been friends with my father and he basically knew me all my life.
"You're right probably, but I don't want to be scared."
"But it's human after all."
"I know."
Still I didn't want my fear to conquer me, as whoever was responsible for my parents' death seemed to be a monster and I could only fight them, if I myself became a monster.
"I'd like to keep you some company after telling you this, but I still have some investigating to do." He sighed.
"Sure, I understand."
He pulled me into a hug and I let it happen, he was a bit like a father to me after all.
"Take care," he mumbled, before leaving.
I sank into the arm chair for a moment, I wanted to scream or something to release my feelings, but I was just shocked. I felt restless and didn't know what to do with myself. After a while of not knowing what to do, I decided to look for Lissa and see if she was already awake.

I knocked on her door 3 times, but didn't receive an answer, so I went in, but only to find an empty room, 'though some clothes were lying folded on her bed, she was probably taking a shower right now.
Wandering through her room, I managed to trip over something. I sat up and noticed, that I had stumbled over one of her shoes, when something else peeked my interest.
There was a gold necklace in her shoe.
"What a weird place to put a necklace," I thought to myself before picking it up to inspect it.
The necklace had a round flat pendant with neat ornaments and there were words engraved in it.
It read "Elissabeth Cherryline Thalheim".
I gasped and let the necklace fall.
That was the name of the princess of Crimson.
"Oh my God!" I mumbled, then covered my mouth with my hand.
Now everything made sense.
In a really twisted, horrific kinda way everything made sense.
When Lissa told me her name was Lissa Thalia, I wasn't sure whether she was telling the truth, but I just shrugged it off. That she was always so reserved about anything private made sense now.
And it finally made sense, why she was so okay with marrying me. After what Chief Inspector Montgomery told me, I was more than sure, that all she wanted was to corrupt me, if not kill me.
The room started spinning and I felt nauseous.
"Don't faint, don't faint," I said to myself.
Then the door opened and Lissa came in, wrapped in a towel.
"What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost."
I stood up abruptly and faced her with a furious expression.
"You honestly have the guts to ask me what's wrong with me? You're a traitor, Lissa, or should I rather say, Elissabeth, since that's your real name?!"
She opened her mouth to say something, but I wasn't finished with her.
"I trusted you! I fucking trusted you, for God's sake! How could you be so cruel?!"
"I can explain-"
"No, don't! I'm sick of your lies, I don't want to know anything from you anymore. Get your things and leave this castle!"
She started crying. But she was probably just acting.
"I'm sorry," she spoke with a broken voice.
"No, you're not, but I'm sorry. For ever thinking love could be anything, but weakness. However, I've learned my lesson. Now get yourself out of here and don't you dare to ever come back, or I'll kill you!"
She sank down to her knees and every sob seemed to shake her whole body.
What a pretender.
I turned around.
Now I was finished with her.