Soulmate

Twenty Six: Jin

September 2, 2019
Seoul, South Korea

The front door of the dorm slams loudly, startling me and my other five members on the couch. We look around each other in confusion. There are very few people that have access to our house. The only person who even has a key would be—

"Yoongi?" I ask in shocked confusion upon seeing his distressed form enter the living room.

My younger member breathes heavily, paces trails into the floor, runs his hands aggressively through his already messy hair.

"Hyung," Namjoon says as he stands to his feet. "Is something wrong?"

The man finally stops pacing to finally look at the rest of us. His arms drop to his sides in defeat and he exhales exasperatedly.

"She's pregnant," he says blankly.

We look at each other again. The sjock in my mind is reflected on everyone else's faces.

"Say what now?" Hoseok squeaks

"Areum," Yoongi grumbles. "She's pregnant."

Namjoon and I make eye contact, communicating without words. We both had wondered, especially with her being so sick so suddenly.

"That's amazing!" Taehyung chirps excitedly. "Oh my gosh, there'll be a baby!"

Yoongi stares at him in disbelief, practically slapping the grin off of Taehyung's sweet face.

"No," he says firmly. "No, this isn't how it's supposed to go! We had a plan! This can't happen yet!" He sinks into the couch and covers his face. I can see him biting his lip harshly to keep from crying. "We can't have it. I don't want it."

My eyes widen and I stand up quickly from the couch to stand beside Namjoon. "You what now?" 

Yoongi looks at me with wild eyes. "I don't want it."

I'm speechless.

"What do you mean?" Namjoon asks, an air of sadness to his voice. "How could you not want it? It's...your baby."

Yoongi shakes his head. His hands return to his scalp where he continues to nearly tear out his dark hair. "I can't. We can't yet, not you." He buries his face in his hands again and his shoulders start to shake. "This wasn't supposed to happen. It can't happen yet!"

"I just don't get it," Jungkook says plainly. "What's so wrong with Areum having a baby? You guys are married."

"Everything!" Yoongi whimpers. "Everything's wrong. We had a timeline, we agreed on what was best. We're married and nobody even knows! I've been in a private relationship for five years. How am I supposed to hide a baby? How am I supposed to eventually tell the fans that I've been living a completely different life than the one they see?"

"We're all living different lives," Namjoon says. "Not a single one of us is the same as we appear in front of the cameras."

"How can I take care of a life?" he continues. "A baby is so small. It isn't like marriage. Areum and I take care of each other, but I don't think I can make raising a kid as well-balanced as our marriage." He wipes the tears off his cheeks. "I'm hardly ever home. I was gone for half this year. How am I supposed to raise a child the way it deserves? How am I supposed to be a present father when this is still my career? I'll barely be able to be here for my wife once this vacation ends. How can I be responsible enough to take care of a family when I can't even be responsible enough to stick to my own plan?"

"Min Yoongi," Jimin says firmly. "You have got to calm down. You're too emotional and you're being irrational."

"How am I being irrational?"