❝ My name is [Y/N], I am a goddess, you are worms. Therefore, you should refer to me as [Y/N]-sama and always be aware of your boundaries with a divine entity such as myself, got it? ❞
❝ Got it! ❞
...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
[💎]
It was a peaceful summer noon. Tanjiro and Zenitsu had decided to help out [Y/N], since Tengen —forced by her— told them that she needed more help than usual because new cloths and jewels just came in from Europe. She was hyped just opening the boxes. Due to the big classification of jewels, they were sat down on the wooden floor to classify each of them.
It was all silence until Zenitsu stood up to go get something to eat, and [Y/ N] began to pout, thinking thoughts.
"Tan-kun, what would you do if Zenitsu didn't touch you?"
Tanjiro, confused, looked up at her.
"What? Why would he touch me?"
"Isn't he your boyfriend?" she asked, rolling her eyes as if it were obvious.
In response, Tanjiro shook his head several times with a really worried look for the seamstress' mental state. [Y/N]'s eyebrows rose and her mouth went agape, she was almost sure that the blond was his boyfriend due to how much he clung to the burgundy boy, and the stories Tengen told her about them.
"Oh, sorry. Then is it Inosuke?"
Tanjiro shook his head again.
"Ugh, well then, pretend that they are. Either of them."
He smiled softly, and attentively continued classifying the jewels while keeping his attention on her. "If it helps you, I'll listen."
"Thank you" she said, before clearing her throat to proceed "What would you do if you've been in a relationship for years, but he has never touched you. No holding hands, nor kisses, not even teasing!"
"That sounds hard considering how Zenitsu is." he chuckled to himself, while [Y/N] scrowled even further.
"Right? So you'd think that he would love to have some intimacy with a person as incredibly talented and absolutely cute as myself— I mean, you."
Tanjiro nodded, as he imagined the situation in his mind and how he would go about things.
"Yes, I'm his boyfriend so I expect some intimacy in the relationship." he replied, convinced of what he would do.
She nodded repeatedly, strongly agreeing with the boy. Then, Zenitsu came in, having eaten two cookies from the basket that was supposed to be for clients. He was humming as he sat down in his previous place on the floor next to Tanjiro and in front of Yua, and continued classifying gemstones. Two stares over him made him raise his head and exchange a look between them.
"What did I miss?"
"[Y/N]-san is pretending we're a couple."
Zenitsu, offended, was about to scream.
"Excuse me, what?"
And they both ignored his complaints and kept analyzing the predicament.
"The thing is that Zen won't touch you, even though you've been married for three years!"
"Wait, now we're married?" Tanjiro asked, surprised.
Zenitsu let out a dramatic gasp "Three years without touching?! What kind of messed up imagination do you have?"
[Y/N], ignoring them again, continued talking "The only moments in which he would hug me is when we're having a family hug! That's why the pillars say I'm unofficial, because he won't fucking touch me!"
"I thought you were talking about us...?"
But she continued, feeling herself getting angrier each word that came out of her lips.
"How could he not want to touch someone as flamboyant as I? I'm such a gorgeous creature!"
"That's debatabl—"
Tanjiro hit Zenitsu in the back of his neck before he could say something that he would regret later, and kept his kind smile while doing it as to let the seamstress know that he was paying attention.
"Have you talked to him about it?"
"No, I get too flustered! And now that he's retired and spending more time at home, it's more noticeable. He closes the door when he and my co-wives enter the bedroom, giggling!"
Zenitsu's face gained a disgusted expression just hearing those words, he almost wanted to either throw up or punch Tengen for having such good luck.
"What? Why would he close it?" Tanjiro asked, with an innocent surprised pikachu face.
Zenitsu looked at Tanjiro as if it were obvious what they were talking about. "Dude, are you seriously asking that?"
"I know I'm younger, but I'm still an adult! I deserve to be touched by my husband!"
Tanjiro gave her a determined nod, while Zenitsu was determinedly cringing.
[Y/N] massaged her temples, frowning, and stood up.
"Ugh, this topic is giving me a headache. I need a drink, do you guys want one too?"
"No thanks, we're underage."
This time it was [Y/N] who had question marks around her, confused. "Are you underage to drink milk?"
Zenitsu chuckled to himself again. "No, but apparently you are."
She frowned further "What do you mean???"
Tanjiro was surprised again.
"You've been talking about touching but you don't get it?" he asked, shortening the distance between the two of them to whisper indecent stuff about intimacy and why her husband closed the door on her.
She was in shock. A blushing shock, she was redder than any cloths her store had, redder than Tanjiro's hair. Smoke would come out of her overheated cheeks.
Tanjiro panicked at the overheating woman, pulling his friend back before things got worse "Z-Zenitsu! She meant hugs and holding hands, not that!"
And [Y/N], coming out of her shock, punched him so hard that he was sure to get a black eye.
