Safe at Night

26

I was sitting on the balcony. Holding a two photo album, trying myself to calm down.

I'm waiting for Night to wake up, she's still asleep until now. It's almost six in the evening. The sun is setting.

I got my phone from my pocket to composed a message to Messi.

To Messi:

I'm going to tell Night about Mom tonight.

I waited for her to reply. I damp my finger on the floor, impatient and nervous.

My phone vibrated indicated Messi replied.

Are you sure, Kuya?

I asked myself, Am I sure? I'm not sure if I can handle the pain but one thing for sure, I love her so I trust her.

Huminga ako ng malalim at itinabi ang cellphone sa gilid ko. I close my eyes as I try to calm myself and inhale to fill my lungs an air.

Mom, If you're watching me wherever you are—guide me and tell me that everything's going to be well.

Is it okay to tell your story though? Am I allowed?

But nevertheless, I'd tell her everything. She's my sunshine and my safest place at night.

I opened the photo album. Bumungad sa akin ang isang buong pamilya. That was us, the happy family I used to have.

It was Mom carrying the three years old me and my dad beside wearing a basketball jersey carrying a ball in his hands.

We look so happy.

We look so happy before.

I want to think that atleast once in my life I had a happy family.

"Good evening."

I turned my head only to see Night in her pajamas and messy hair. Bagong gising, I smiled by looking at her.

Damn, my girl look pretty even she just woke up.

"Tagal mong magising," I teased her.

She rolled her eyes and sat beside me. "Buti nga nagising pa e," She sarcastically said.

She look at me. "Watchu doing?" She cutely asked.

I didn't answer, instead, I look at the photo album and scan the pictures. I go back to the family picture.

"This is your Dad, right?" She pointed at the guy who's holding a ball and wearing a jersey.

I nodded. "And this is me," I pointed at myself.

I look at her, kunot ang noo nito at nakatingin sa nag-iisang hindi niya kilala.

"This is not Veronica."

I chuckled on what she said. "Never will be Veronica."

I saw her gulp, unsteady and looks like she's having a trouble of speaking.

I know, I know she don't want to ask me because she respect my privacy, and I love her even more for that.

"That's my Mom," I said looking at her.

Her mouth hang open. Kinuha nito ang photo album sa kamay ko.

"Dang it, she's pretty!"

She scanned each photos with adore in her eyes.

Itinapat niya ang litrato sa tabi ng mukha ko. Pinagsingkitan niya ang mata niya.

"Hmm," She hummed. "You kinda look like her," She said.