To The Void [kth X reader]

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Jungkook woke up early and went out to take a walk. The rest gloomily revised their plannings, avoiding loopholes and anymore sacrifices. Y/n and Taehyung were still in the bed. The others let them be. They all had their own coping mechanisms and none of them interfered with anyone. They were a crying mess for the first few weeks, and now......they are just a mess.

Y/n was sleeping composedly, her face towards Taehyung, who was in deep thought. I made my choice, you should make yours, the words kept on going in repeat in his mind. The person who realised him of his feelings wouldn't be able to see the same feelings blossom into something beautiful, or so he hoped. 

He noticed how her face has dulled down but still looked tough and strong, maturer and cleverer, like she is in a thorough planning. The roundness of her cheeks have disappeared and he could feel the ridges starting to form on her stomach and her prominent bicep. She no more looked like a child, but a grown beautiful woman.

She exhaled loudly before cracking her eyes open only to be captured by his eyes. "Hey...." she mumbled while stretching out.

"How you feeling?"

"Mmm not good." She mumbled sitting up and tying her hair in a ponytail. She sat hunched and her legs crossed infront of her. Taehyung's hand went to her back, rubbing in an uneven pattern.

"What are you thinking?" 

"Hm? Nothing........Just a bad dream." She vigorously rubbed her face. She felt him shift from his previous spot to mount beside her, his arm protectively around her body but not touching her.

"You want to talk about it?" he combed the baby hair behind her ear while waiting for her to reply. She knew, talking would only make her feel even worse, maybe would even make her cry so she shook her head signalling a 'no'.

"You want me to hold you?"

"Yes, please." she breathed out. He cradled her in his arms and made her sit on his thighs. She inhaled his familiar scent that is now her favourite. 

Taehyung didn't know what to do. Neither of them wanted to speak first. Taehyung's promise of 'talking about 'us','  that lingered in the air made them question whether they should pretend that nothing happened given the situation or talk about it.

"Can I say something?" His morning voice resonated through her body from where his chest connected to her side. She looked up at his still tired face, encouraging him to go on. "The day of the mission......Jimin....Jimin told me something....." He let her adjust in his grip as she sat a bit more attentively, looking deeply into his eyes. Involuntarily, she grabbed his hand and started playing with his fingers to calm him down all the while staring at his face.

"H-he told me to......make a choice, because we never know what this game has in for us. We never know when we would.......l-lose someone on our way." He licked his lips before pursing them. His breath started getting strained as he tried to keep his voice even. "He said that he has made his choice, and I should make mine." He stopped speaking, looking at the girl in his arms. Her eyes had diverted to their entwined hands while she listened to him. 

When she heard him pause for long, she lifted her head only to see him inches close to her face. There was no more energy left in her to feel stunned or embarrassed. Slowly blinking, she tilted her head questioningly. "Choice.......about what?" Her eyebrows furrowed.

"This." 

He closed the gap between them and connected their lips together. She moved her hand to the side of his face while his gripped her waist and shoulders. He felt his body go on edge as she started kissing him back, moving her lips in perfect rhythm with his. He moved his lips softly against her, and her reciprocating it further encouraged him. It was more happening for her. She was just a girl, but he, he was her idol, the one she never deserved. It was a small yet significant one. This was something they both wanted but the ecstasy died down when the current feeling set in.

 They kept their eyes closed until Y/n felt liquid slither down her fingers.

Removing her forehead from his, she wiped the tear away from his face. 

"I-I am so so-rry.........I-I a-am trying but I just k-keep hurting y-you." He whimpered in her hands. Her heart softened and hurt at the same time. 

"Hey.......Look at me." She said firmly. "Taehyung, look at me."

His eyes had reddened and tears kept streaming down his face. He tiredly turned to look at her.

"You don't have to do anything right now, alright? Just relax. No one's in a hurry." 

"I don't want to lose anyone anymore, please." His face scrunched as another sob escaped his lips.

"You won't baby, you won't." He had his face hidden in the crook of her neck while she rubbed his back and petted his hair. She couldn't even imagine what he was going through right now. She only was feeling so much even though she has known Jimin for the shortest time. That guy was their family, the pain would be so much worse to them.

"I-I-----"

"I told you to relax, right? Don't take stress. I am not going anywhere, hm? I'll wait, don't worry yourself." She mumbled with a smile. Even though he couldn't see her, she smiled, not only reassuring him, but herself that everything will get over without anymore losses.

Winning won't bring Jimin back.

Winning won't remove the scars.

Winning won't take away the trauma from their minds.

But losing will make her ripped away of the only thing keeping her alive.

These boys.

She has nothing to gain, but everything to lose now.

The thoughts in her mind are shattered when the front door of the house is slammed open and closed with a loud bang. Without glancing at each other, Taehyung and Y/n run outside to examine the commotion. 

The boys were already suited up as they looked at the person who just entered.

Their stood Jungkook with big, terrified eyes, his back on the door as he panted hardly and the sweat on his face dripping on the ground. 

"I am sorry, I fucked up."

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