"There's always something to be thankful for ever since you came into my life. I am thankful that I was lost because you were the one who found me when I thought I had nowhere else to go. I am thankful for my hands because they get to hold yours. I am thankful for my eyes and the gift of feeling happy because I see you and you're so beautiful like a summer sunset when it's time to go home, and you will always be my coming home. You are always my being grateful to be alive".
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IS IT GOING TO BE A GOOD DAY TODAY?Is today the day that I'll be able to meet that person? this is something I ask myself every morning when I wake up.
I just want to be surrounded by that one kind of love in my life that makes me wanna live one more day~the kind of love that makes me love my home, my work, the stars, the sunsets~~ I want to experience love in all forms with that just one person I'm waiting for~~
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I'm trying to keep my eyes open while the director of my new drama~~SOMEONE LIKE YOU (oohh!! it's the name of my new drama in case you people might get confuse) drones on and on.. He's always chit-chatting with others ~~maybe he likes it this way--‐------------------o_o
Those who really know me they have an idea that I always have to stay cautious and alarming~~my agency won't probably want an idol/actor that causes them trouble too often so I'm always surrounded by my staff and managers but to me they look like they're all in a herd protecting their king!!
I want to shout and tell them loudly that just leave me alone, it seems like I'm breathing someone else's air inside me<<<
What really piss me off is wherever I go they're all telling me that I'm handsome, I'm smart, intelligent this and that and all those things that I've heard countless times. I do appreciate them but can't they think beyond this-
I know it's hard to look at someone who's good at everything (*not bragging about myself *) : but what matters to me is what do they think of me beyond that : just ask me once what I really want~~will I ever find someone who's any different from them?
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At night when I'm lying awake because my brain won't shut off due to all there is to think about.
IS TODAY THE DAY? AND IF NOT TODAY------------WHEN?
I'm asking myself this now maybe because I think today is the day and I think I'm ready to let all of it go~~someday's it's the hollowness and the emptiness that eats me up it just makes me feel more vulnerable and helpless about myself!!
Maybe this time I'll do it-- let the air carry me away. It will be like floating in a pool until there's nothing!!
And within few minutes of self examination I started running as fast as I could not knowing where the wind is going to take me---I open my eyes to see the air rushing past my body, to see the road that is still there, hard and permanent~
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I'm at the Mapo Bridge, standing on it's ledge that is about four inches wide. The bridge is pretty long having a scenic view with it's extremely tall height---every now and then I knock one of my legs against it to remind myself it's there~
With my arms outstretched, "Ladies and gentlemen," I shout, "I would like to welcome you to my death!" cause the reason I'm here right now is I'm awake again and all I think about is dying, I can't live with this hollowness and sadness anymore, I'm so tired of all these things~
I don't know why I find this funny but people out there can pretend that they saw nothing if they find someone standing on the ledge of a bridge taking away their precious life.
I mean dude it's my life !! And I can't let these thoughts eat all of my brain~I'm just standing here feeling the wind I guess-- (*Did I made it sound worse ---ohh! apologies for that*)
I saw someone's finger pointing at me from away and then suddenly he turns his head away from me and he points at the sky-- (*what a shame I thought someone noticed me*)
At first I thought he was pointing at me, but it's at that moment I see her, the girl.
She stands a few feet away from me out on the same ledge, dark- blond hair waving in the breeze, she is shoeless in jeans, a pair of converse in her hand, and staring either at her feet or at the water down below.
it's difficult and hard to tell. She seems frozen and shivering down in that place.
I shouted as loud as I could, "Hey! you small one, take it from me the don't even dare to look down."~but being far away she wasn't able to hear me.
Very slowly, she started moving towards me and the moment her head turned I...I...I..~~~I can't resist----Holy!! what~~~ my heart started beating too fast as if it was to die today!! (*I'm kind of scared now! What the hell just happened to me*)
I forgot the thing I came here for~she was really small like about the one who can just reach my shoulders if she's standing next to me--------------still I found her a bit cute__o_o (*it's nothing more than cute--don't even try to take your imagination and thoughts overboard*)
But why is she here? What caused her soo much strength to come here? Did something bad happen to this small one? Did someone bully her? what made her stand here risking her life that much?
"TO BE CONTINUED"
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♡I don't know if this chapter was too depressing!! I just simply hope that the one's who read it liked it and are eagerly waiting for the next one ♡
♡If you too have felt something that eunwoo feels or what he believes in do comment and feel free to share your thoughts and views about it and don't forget to tap that star you see on your left end corner♡
