UP THERE. | ジグク [DISCONTINUED]

eleven :: anger is a drug.

十一 | onigiri rice cakes.
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550 reads and 100 votes?? i haven't had that much reads so fast, my top record currently is 900 reads on a disappointingly horrible story and it took me over a year to reach that absurd number 😭💙 thank you all so much!

be prepared for quite a bit of angst at the beginning ;)

[ ♪ ]

september 5th, 2014.

"seriously?! you're being so fucking dumb! didn't know you were that much if a push over. pathetic, really."

"ggukie, i really tried, i tried to reason with them—"

"then you should have tried harder! since when did you fucking want to be a doctor?! really? i thought we were going through this together! we talked about this, don't you remember?!"

my eyes were red. puffy.

each time i would reach out to wipe a tear, seemingly thousands more would rip through my tear duct.

"i know that! i fucking know! stop acting like i chose this! you know how my parents are, jeongguk! you're the one who knows their shit the best!"

my throat was hoarse. dry.

hurting from the constant yelling that escaped my lips. unfamiliar. it didn't feel right to scream.

especially not at him.

"you're nineteen. you're not underage anymore. both of us are legal fucking adults. we're not kids anymore, jimin, we can choose our own futures!"

though we both knew screaming wouldn't bring us anywhere,

anger was a drug.

a drug you could only realize the consequences of after you overdose.

"exactly. and what if i don't want to spend mine with you?"

my shoulders tensed, the angry frown painted on my face quickly falling from my expression, replaced with sheer pain. the stab his words pierced through my heart was quite easily visible from outside.

and i could simply watch, air knocked out of my lungs, as his own eyes widened in realization, a hand going up to cover his mouth as he looked down, seemingly ashamed.

it's only after you overdose, after everything is already going downhill, that the pain hits you like a truck.

we say things we don't mean. and those words always, always have consequences.

a few seconds, and yet what felt like hours, days of silence took over both of our bodies, only the faint buzzing of the air conditioner filled the void that threatened to crush us into nothingness, a suddenly heavier gravity feeling the need to rip us apart, further then we had already done ourselves using nothing more than words.

because words were nothing less than sharp knives cutting through our bonds.

jimin brought his hand up to pinch at his nose bridge, eyes slamming shut as he lowly exhaled. "we've been going at this for almost two weeks, ggukie. can't we just agree to disagree?"