Lucid Memories

Chapter 19

1st Person POV

I started at my hands before bring them to my face, closing my eyes and letting the feeling finally soak in. It was done. Finally all over. I wanted to scream—exclaiming that I did it—I finally did it. It was an uncontrollable energy that raised my blood pressure—maybe that was the adrenaline to finally find a use of the machine gun but honestly, I wouldn't be able to tell. I couldn't help myself from laughing as much as I hid those feelings at bay. It was uncharacteristic of me. I wasn't sure why one death would make me this way. But looking back at it I couldn't help but have doubts.

I collapsed onto the ground. I didn't know why but I could feel my legs shaking in a way I've never felt before. My feet couldn't support them any longer too. Did I use too must energy? I don't think so? What a strange incident...  I sighed and shrugged before collapsing my back onto the ground. The smell of burning flesh from the monsters were still in the air but I could see them—or at least the souls anyways. The people who were experimented on. Most of them were easily identifiable but some where different. Kids younger than me. Human trafficking. To think something was still going on at this age and time. Crazy, really. Makes me worried for the future.

But yet for me, it just signalled one of my goals were done now. I'm still unsure if that was the right thing to do. But honestly, I'm sick that I'm doubting myself. I should feel confidence in myself. Yet I don't. What's wrong with me. Am I getting scared? I feel that I'm just piling more corpses that so I'll be slowly descending myself to hell. What a scary thought.

But I need to live with these actions.

I grinned inwardly. Now what? I laid on the ground. Even though I didn't fully explore the place, I didn't really want to. Who know what else is laying in the ruins of the lab? I didn't really want to get myself kill especially if there's no certainly to know if anything from the past still exist there.

I narrow my eyes. After all, there's no way the Dazai and Chuuya of that time should "exist" still. That'll be impossible and more importantly is the fact that I'm not a miracle worker. I can't just imagine them there and bam, still alive. Like hell. That was a decade ago and know this scientist's habits there's no way...

Yet somehow I jumped at the bottom of the fire pit of death. It was clear and with surprisingly a few survivors. I dealt with them easily and sent them to their way in the sky before confirming there's way no more before going to the bottom levels. It was a long, winding staircase down to the abyss. Luckily with the gifts of the government that Dazai gave me for my birthday—or undercover birthday—I easily protected myself as I saw many things. The most memorable thing was the night goggles. I'd never thought I would have a use like that for a long while. I guess, thanks to him I didn't to go and purchase them myself. The clothes fit well. Just too well. I kind of what to know how he obtain my measurements. But truthfully, I'd like to think—mainly for my peace in mind—he was good at guessing.

Namely the bones of previous prisoners and chains that accompanied them to the other side. There were bits of rags still left alone but honestly most of them were gone. Where did they go? Reused? Who knows, I certainly didn't. I shrugged before venturing lower.

It was getting steep. But most importantly, I could see a pile of flipped over carts and over things they officers had to administrate to the captivities. I could see the shattered needles, bottles and tipped over trays and other medications that I didn't pay much attention on. It was the steel door that seemed wide open. Ah, inviting me to my death. How lovely. Let me just take a step in.

Unfortunately, as much as I hate this job. There are benefits. But it feels like it gets overshadowed by things like this. Something more dangerous than the incident of getting caught red handed with attempted assassination. The unknown. Sometimes, I feel like I don't get paid enough for dealing with crap like this. Like seriously...

Inside there was not much different than those office corridors. Just super aged. Feels like just a little pressure would make the entire thing to break. Unfortunately for the poor soul who's left behind, they would get crushed. Aka me. I frown and continued to walk down the hall. The moss and webs on the walls and hallways didn't help either. It was just plain disgusting. There were once signs on the walls, but the text is long ago. Makes you think how normal it must have been when this operation was still active. Maybe it was just me jinxing how much this looks like a bland hallway that I actually feel like I've been here before. Yeah, I don't know about that one chief. Maybe I should've just waited for that damn helicopter instead of venturing off. But even then, it'll take a few days for them to come. Unlucky.

Another step forward, my head started spin. I groan in annoyance. Just when I thought it stopped... I close my eyes trying to relax my nerves however this one was the most powerful one to date. Fuck...! I feel like I was going to trip on my feet at this rate. I need to get out... like now...

"Over here..."

But someone thing pulled me towards to continue to walk forward. Especially the voice that I heard. It was barely a whisper but in this quiet hell hole, that definitely louder than I ever wanted. Was I being stalked? By who though, I couldn't sense anyone nearby... Just like that, that was my decision to running down the hallway. A stupid one I must admit. But a reason why I could push ahead. And just like that, voices continued to play.

"Almost there..."

"Daily examinations..."

"Just us three, like usual..."

"I don't want to stay in the tubes again..."

"It's okay, we're are for you..."

At this point, I'm sure I was going crazy this time. This voices... there's no way though... They had to by coming from my head, right?

I dashed towards a lone hallway, colour draining from my face quicker and quicker. There was just one door—broken down—yet opened. I could barely see what was inside. Just how did I come here... again...? I can feel my anxiety rising as I passed through the door frame and took in my surrounding.

Recalling from the conversation that the voice had, it sounds like it had to be from the past. Daily examinations... Like usual... Definitely it had to be past events that been continuous worked on since then or even now. But that wasn't it. Tubes... Must be the test tubes from that one dream long ago. Since there wasn't as electricity down here, there's definitely no way it can be a present event. Those test tubes from that dream looked advanced and therefore there must mean it needs a power source to support all those test tubes and perform the regular duties. And the voice that I heard...

Inside the room, I came face to face to two test tubes with people in it. They were most certainly alive from what the life support function on the panel says but the more shocking thing was that before I entered the room, they were still—passing it off as them being dead. Just how in the hell—no... when did they start staring at me...?

And especially reflecting to me that I should know them. I knew it was a shot in the dark, but still tried. "Dazai...? Chuuya...? Is that you..."