Going Viral

Chapter 14

July 31st

Percy had spent the day moping. On several occasions, Thalia had snapped at him to get his head back onto the album and Nico had smacked his arm with a drumstick to get his attention. It was no use.

He'd royally messed up.

He didn't pretend to understand half the things Annabeth had been through, they'd never explicitly talked about their own traumas, but it was obvious he'd hit a nerve. Percy only wanted to help. All he'd ever wanted to do was help.

Dozens of messages were left on a notes page on his phone and he hadn't had the guts to send her one. Besides, he was hurting too. This wasn't the first time Percy had failed someone.

There had been a moment where he'd felt so useless, she was upset and was making sure he knew it, but the realisation that he'd lived that scene many times knocked the air out of his lungs and made him feel so young again, longing to go home to curl up on his mom's lap like he always used to.

The moment with Annabeth became the memory of Grover crying to him in secret in the boys bathrooms in 3rd period because someone had made a comment about his leg and Nancy had shoved him to the floor again. And young, naïve Percy was there beside his friend with his plastered knees and bruises of his own wishing he'd been there to help Grover off of the floor and back to his crutches. It was Sally's stern look when he'd arrived back at their apartment with flushed cheeks and wet hair, ranting about the days happenings before realising that he needed to shut up. Gabe couldn't hear him being so ungrateful for the school tuition his gambling was funding. It was the way her eyes softened as Percy's face dropped and he knew his mom was so sorry for everything but right now there was nothing she could do. There was a new purple mark on her wrist where Gabe had grabbed her the night before. Percy's vision had blurred. It never stopped. It had been the way that he'd held his baby sister the day she was born and cried because she was perfect. She was precious and the world was cruel and harsh and there was nothing he could do to fix it for her. For anyone.

It was the helplessness he had felt his whole life and once again, Percy couldn't do anything.

He knew he should message Annabeth, at least just to apologise for making her feel useless. She's not useless in the slightest. She's resourceful and intelligent and beyond talented, but she's also prideful. Annabeth deserved to be recognised for her abilities but god forbid anyone should try and help her with it.

"Percy! That was your cue! Gods, what is with you today?" Thalia waved to the guys in the sound booth dismissively and stalked over to where Percy was lent against an amp.

"It's nothing, Thals, I'm okay."

"I never asked how you felt, dingus, but if you're gonna insist you're fine then something's definitely wrong." She knew him too well.

It supposedly came with the territory. The three of them, Percy, Nico and Thalia, had grown up together. They'd been grouped up for a music assignment in 10th Grade and never really looked back. It wasn't until their first semi-professional gig at a wedding that they realised they were cousins - and that was only because their fathers had all shown up as guests and caused so much of a scene that they'd been kicked off the premises. Having the three brothers in one room tearing each other apart and dismissing any inkling of pride they might have for their child really demonstrates the state of their happy family.

"Annabeth and I fell out."

Nico hums and passes him the songwriting notebook but it's quickly shoved away. "C'mon, Perce, we need an angsty rock number from you right about now, all this love crap's getting old."

"Tell that to yourself. You and Will were pining all of last year if I remember correctly." Thalia comments before nudging Percy. "I'm sure you and Annabeth are just going through a rough patch, besides, you're not even dating yet and you care enough to feel bad after your first fight." Her tone is accusing but he knows she means well.

"I don't know, she seemed really upset. I think I hit sore spot."

"You worry too much." Nico chuckles.

Thalia rolls her eyes. "It's because he's the softie of the three of us."

Percy thinks she's probably right, growing up so close with his mom had certainly made him more gentle and kindhearted, but there was the other side of him that came with not having a father figure until Chiron came along. That part of him was sharp and angry. That was the part of him that Chiron had put him in therapy for, along with getting him a personal trainer who could help him "channel his anger into something revitalising and useful".

Their recording session ends a few painful hours later and Percy decides that maybe he should take the time to follow Nico's advice and write another song. Their demos needed to be submitted by Saturday but that gave him a whole 48 hours to get some kind of outline recorded.

His apartment is empty and there's a note scrawled out on the kitchen counter.

At Juniper's. I'll be back later but don't wait up for me. -G

When he lifts his guitar, he's reminded of his mom. This particular guitar was Percy's most treasured, sure he had three guitars of his own now: his precious Gibson SJ-200 Deluxe, the first thing he'd treated himself to with his rockstar paycheck and the royal blue electric guitar his dad had funded for his 16th but then there was his favorite. It had admittedly seen better days and the strings were getting stiff - probably in need of another replacement - but it was just as special to him as the day he'd got it.

Sally had saved for months to get him this guitar. It was nothing special, a basic acoustic one of the neighbors was selling when their son moved out and so Sally was able to buy Percy's present in time for his 12th birthday. They'd both been so excited when he'd strummed the out of tune strings for the first time. He'd promised to only play guitar when Gabe was out of the apartment (which got to be a smaller window as time went on, but they weren't to know) and Sally had listened intently to the simple sequences of chords he'd been able to muster from his grade school music lessons. It was their little moment of peace away from everything. Just holding the guitar took Percy back ten years.

E minor.

It's Percy's favorite chord - yes, it's a weird thing to have a preference over, he knows - because it's the first one he mastered and the easiest to play. One finger over the second fret on the second and third strings. His music teacher used to chastise him for pulling the strings together instead of using two but by that point it was a habit he was stuck in.

He thumbed a scale to help himself into the right key before he picked a progression.

The words flowed easily once he'd gotten into the swing of it, they always did when something significant happened. His first song was written when they'd finally been rid of Gabe and they'd been on a visit to Montauk. The sea had always been one of Percy's safe spaces because of the way the waves would smash, wild and unforgiving, before dissolving into sea foam and retreating. When he was feeling poetic, he would compare himself to the sea and twist it into some angst ridden lyrics. It makes for a good song.

Break my heart, like they all do
I'm hurting, girl, because of you
Can't help but take it back last night
The things I said, I know weren't right

Knock one back and call it a day
A round or so more, thats child's play
Blame it on the beer when the phone starts ringing
You won't catch me saying this, you'll only catch me singing

I'd do anything to see you smile
Leave me broken in a ruined pile
Beat me back and blue, nothing will matter
I'll give you my heart if you want it to shatter