Teaching Elementary, My Dear Watson

23 - Ending & Beginning

23

Ending & Beginning

Monday-Friday, December 26-30

Each morning after breakfast, Kevin went for a drive. He knew his parents were hoping he would share about his marriage, but he wasn't ready. He still needed alone time to heal. The days were cool and foggy but without rain. Wearing sweats and layers for warmth, he handled the cold in comfort. One day, he drove to Berkeley's Strawberry Canyon and ran the hills above the football stadium. Another day, he went to Tilden Park and jogged along some of the trails. Every day, Kevin explored some paths that had a view of the San Francisco Bay, redwoods, meadows, or a lake. He needed nature, solitude, and peace. He craved exercise and pushed himself. He didn't let up until he was breathing hard and sweating profusely. At the end of his run, Kevin would then get in his car before the wind chill depleted the warmth he'd generated. He returned home, showered, and read. He finished Wooden's book on coaching and began the one his folks had given him.

He'd heard about Richard Bach's novel, "Jonathan Livingston Seagull", which had been a phenomenal bestseller in the early 70s. It used flying as a metaphor. Kevin felt like a broken bird, someone who was almost grounded. Maybe he needed to learn to spread his wings again. The story was entertaining but also had substance. A few days later, he had finished it, gaining some insights into both his current situation and the future he wanted to create. At dinner on Friday, his folks asked how he was doing.

"I'm better, thanks. Not great, but better. And I appreciated the gift of Bach's book. Just finished it."

Ted asked, "Any insights?"

"Now that I'm on my own again, the book reminds me that I want to soar. By that, I mean I need to set some goals and do good things for myself, so I feel like I'm free again. My happiness cannot depend on Monica or anyone else. I must be content within myself. Maybe I'll find someone new, but that can't define who I am."

Nina asked, "What kind of goals?"

"Well, just general ones so far. Not ready to consider relationship goals yet, but work stuff is relevant. Still want to get better at teaching and coaching. I'm gonna brainstorm more specifics about each of those. I've been reading another book by UCLA's successful basketball coach who talks about the importance of envisioning success, then breaking goals down into smaller, achievable objectives. I'll begin that process tomorrow, thinking about ideas during my drive back south, and will continue to build on it all in the new year."

Ted said, "We'd certainly like to hear what you come up with. Let us know if there's anything that we can do, as always."

"Call anytime you want to talk. We won't push, but we're ready to listen and support you," said Nina.

"I appreciate you two. I know you're here for me. Thanks, but don't worry. This will get better. Just need some time."

They both made a real effort to cut me some slack on this trip. I'm sure they want to understand more details about what happened, but I can't think about what could have or should have occurred instead. It won't help me to second-guess the actions or choices I made with my wife. I must not dwell on the past. They get it.

His parents smiled. His Dad gripped Kevin's shoulder in support. His Mom leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "We love you," she said.

Kevin nodded. I know. You didn't have to say it much when I was growing up because you consistently showed it with your actions, and I've always felt it. All those times you drove me to lessons and worked on committees for my Boy Scout troop. You even joined the tennis club just for me. You never would have done so if it wasn't something I wanted. So thank you. Your support shows me who you are.