Sandcastles | Completed

5 | exchange

• • •

"You're quiet," Ariana observed, reaching to turn down the music that I'd purposely turned up.

I was always quiet before I went to Aidan's, she just wouldn't know that because I usually drove myself. Tonight, however, she damn near insisted that we ride together.

It didn't bother me at first, because we arrived and left at the same time anyway, but now that she was trying to talk to me, I was getting annoyed because I didn't want to talk.

"I'm just focusing," I replied, "Trying not to think about other stuff."

"Other stuff like what?"

"About anything other than the next couple of hours."

Instead of letting it go as I'd hoped, she proceeded to ask more questions, "I noticed you seem stuck in your head again. Everything okay?"

Ariana was a great friend to me. She'd helped me countless times without question and was always available if I needed her, whether that be a sounding board or a warm body pressed against mine.

With that being said, she was also nosy, slightly controlling, and hated changed.

My eyes stayed on the windshield, "I'm fine."

"I'm looking out for you, Ken."

The same words that Jailyn had told me weeks ago.

I wasn't sure where they got the notion that I needed to be looked out for to the point that they intruded on my space, but it was getting old.

"You don't always think with your head." Ari continued, "And I'm not judging, but-"

"Why are we having this conversation right now? I've seen you multiple times, but you waited until now to bring it up?"

I didn't care if she could hear that I was irritated because I wanted her to know.

"You can't go through life acting as if sex makes the world spin. There's more to life than that."

Ariana didn't get a reply, and I hoped she wasn't waiting for one because I wasn't giving it to her. Of course, I knew sex wasn't the only thing that mattered, but it was high on the list for me.

People got in relationships because they needed something from the other person. It was usually money, and I had a job. Companionship, but I had friends and family. Marriage, maybe, but I didn't see that in the cards for me anytime soon. The only part of a relationship that I would benefit from is sex.

Maybe if I ever fell in love I would see the draw.

I turned the volume back up, and the remainder of the ride was uncomfortable. I hated the fact that she chose this moment to broach the subject, ruining the good mood I was in before I walked out of the door.

By the time we arrived at Aidan's, I just wanted to go back home. Likely sensing this, Ariana sighed and gave me an apologetic look, "I shouldn't have brought it up right now."

"Thank you." I replied, "I get what you're tryna' say but I also feel like there's nothing to be worried about so it's kind of annoying."