I'm Fine

6

There's enough blood on my bedroom floor to feed vampires, if they were real.

There's less blood in my body than before, making me happier.

"Evelynn?" I hear a male voice say. I can't make out whos, though.

The razor blade falls from my hands, making a cling on the floor. The room becomes dizzy, and my eyes become heavy.

"Evelynn, no!" Suddenly, two arms hold me up from the ground as I fall. "Evelynn, you've gotta wake up. Come on. Please."

Before I could hear anything else, I faint. Thankful that today is my day.

-
I wake up in a white room, loud noises.

"God. What is that sound?" I hoarsely say, straining to keep my eyes open.

"Oh, Evenlynn. Thank God you're awake." The kid from school, Jace, says appearing to my side.

"Uhm, hi.." I awkwardly say. "Look, I don't mean to be rude and all, but, uh, why are you here?"

Jace lets out a small laugh. "Silly girl. Who do you think brought you here?"

My eyes become wide, my heart skips a beat.

"Y-you brought me here?" I stutter.

Jace nods. "Yeah. I came over to see if you wanted to hang out today, but I, instead, saw something I didn't want to see." His eyes become sad as he looks from my arms to my face.

"Oh my..please, what all did you see?" I cover my face with a pillow.

"Well..I seen all the blood on your bedroom floor, and almost hurled. I, also, seen you with razor blades in your hands, and the cuts and scars on your arms."

"Did-did you see my.." my voice becomes lower, "my body?"

I sense a bit of laughter in his voice as he replies, "Yeah, Eve. I did. I seen every inch of you. Sadly, you were covered in blood."

"Shoot." I say, face becoming hot.

"I'd like to ask you a few things, but I believe it can wait until after you're checked out of the hospital."

"Wait, so, how did you get me here, exactly?" I ask, removing the pillow from my face.

"I ran. I carried you in my arms, and ran." I look at Jace's small arms. They have blood spots on them.

"God, Jace. I'm so sorry. I probably weighed a ton. You weren't supposed to be there. How did you know where I lived?" I ask.

"Jaslyn told me."

"Of course, I should've known." I say, narrowing my eyes.

"But, don't worry, I didn't tell her about...this." Jace eyes me in the hospital bed, weak and nimble.

"You will, anyways." I roll over, turning the television off, to look out the window. I wonder how far down it is, and if they would notice I had jumped.

"Eve. I won't. I won't tell anyone. I keep secrets." Jace walks to the side of bed so I can see him. His smile is all I notice.

"This isn't a secret anyone should know. I tried to hide it for so long," fresh hot tears run down my face, "I tried. I failed. I'm a failure." I bring my knees to my chest and cry. Cry. That three letter word sums up my life. All I do anymore is cry. No, not try. Cry.

"Evelynn, you're not a failure," Jace carefully wraps an arm around my shoulder, pulling me close. "I think you're a winner for hiding it so long. I never would have guessed you self harmed. Does Jaslyn know?"

"Like the stupid whore would care," I scoff at her name. "She doesn't care about anyone or anything but herself and dicks. She likes you, Jace, and she got angry when you talked to me today at school."

"Believe me, I know." Jace says, annoyed. "But that doesn't change the fact I think you're a winner. You're a survivor in more ways than I know. You're a great person, even like this. And that won't change our friendship."

I guess Jace is right. I am a survivor in more ways than he knows.

But I'm not a great person.

Why would he want to be friends with me?

The freak.