Say Goodnight Before You Leave

35. Bikini Tan

Past. Hørsholm, Denmark.

I might've gotten three hours of sleep, not consecutive, and despite my tiredness, my eyes weren't staying closed any longer, now that the sun started pouring through the blinds, and the morning heat started catching up to me.

Having Mads and Lylia on both my sides, still sleeping heavily, I slide down the bed to leave the room. I put on my flipflops and go downstairs in the quietness of the house. I need to breathe some fresh beach air and be face to face with the sea.

When I step onto the pier, I see a different world before my eyes, tremendously more alive than last night. The sand's white and smooth and the heath a pale green. The sea wide and blue, waves big enough for mild surfing. The screaming seagulls the only thing against the wide cloudless sky.

"You up so early?" Someone asks making me turn to the side.

On the very corner of the deck is Joyce, legs crossed and a joint between her fingers. The spring-like look she had yesterday isn't there anymore, rather she looked exhausted with bags under her blue eyes. As the adrenaline of the surprise leaves my body, I offer a small smile. I try to discreetly brush down my tangled hair as I sit down on the opposite edge.

"I couldn't sleep much."

"Only fair, I didn't even bother trying."

"Having weed for breakfast helps it?"

"You're some goodie two shoes?"

I laugh. "Some would say."

"Well it does help me, but it's because I just don't like sharing, so I do it before everyone's up. Nevertheless, I offer you."

"No, thanks. And also, thank you for staying at the Police station last night."

"No problem at all." She takes a drag and smiles. "We didn't talk much."

"Yeah." I hug my folded legs. "Uhm, I'm not that interesting."

"Not because of that. Because you didn't like me. Listen, you're not obligated to like me, I don't know if gave some wrong impression or-"

"No, you didn't."

"Then why?"

"I guess I got jealous."

She laughs. "Really? Of me? With Mads?"

I nod, a hundred times more embarrassed about it than ever before. "You're very pretty, I don't get the surprise."

"But Mads' my cou... sin. Oh, I get it now." She laughs again adjusting her posture. "My affection for Mads is a hundred percent platonic. We're not that kind of family, I swear."

"I see that now... I'm clinically dumb, please, don't feel bad."

"If Caspian, who is the brain of the family, said he would marry you then I think you're off to a great start."

"Caspian's the brain?"

She wiggles the joint in her hand with a smile. "I promise you, I try to be a good influence, but then my influence was Larsen, so... Hopefully, he'll go to college unlike us, and find a reason to wear white shirts and ties."

"You want that for him?"

"I fucking do. Caspian's a smart boy, I don't regret my decisions, but I know he's capable of so much more."

"What do you do?"

"I'm a manager at a diner downtown Esbjerg." She takes one last drag and puts out the joint. "I'm trying to save enough to move back here, but I don't know, I'm kinda hoping they promote me."