Head over Heels (ON HOLD)

Chapter.19

Remo.

"Pass me the pizza asshole." I howl at Romero.

Romero, Adamo, Kiara, Alessio and I were sitting in our drawing room and was watching a cage fight. It was Romero's turn for the fight at Roger's next week. So we were paying close attention to his opponent on television.

"Holy Fuck." Adamo screeches from his seat when the man nearly thrashes the head of the other one spilling blood all over the cage.

"How can you guys tolerate such a blasphemy?" Adamo hisses.

"Blood. Blood and more blood. Nothing else. I am sick of your bloody games guys. If this is what costs me to be a Man Made then I'll happily walk around the street of Vatican preaching."

I was at the verge of losing my shot to Adamo's uninvited piece of advice. Being the youngest he has never shown his consent in what we do and has always opposed the idea. But lately, he has been throwing a lot of tantrums for the upcoming ceremony in which he is going to be made the Man Made. Betraying the Outfit is like betraying yourself. If you are sworn into a mafia world there is no way of escape. You are born in blood and you will leave with bloody stains in your hand.

"That suits you shithole." Romero mocks Adamo.

"Fuck you Romero." Adamo stands from his seat and waves his hand at us all.

"Have you decided on the tattoo you are going to do on the day of ceremony?" Alessio asks with a calm demeanor.

"Tatoo? Are you out of your brains Alessio? I said fuck you and your outfit."

To this I lose my last ounce of patience that I have been controlling ever since Adamo's episode.

I jump from my seat and launch myself on Adamo. I give a tight slap right across his left cheek. The slap was bad enough to bust his lips and blood began to ooze out from it. The look on his face was much painstaking than the blood dripping from the corner of his mouth. Even I too was taken back by my menial act. I have never ever raised my hand against any of my brothers.

But what is happening to me lately?

Alessio and Romero soon blocks Adamo from me.

No! I didn't hurt him or Did I really do that?

Fuck! Fuck!

I soon get out of the room and head for the gymnasium. What the hell is happening to me? Why am I acting out like a asshole?

I have bereft of sleep work and mind for the past few fucking days. Something or someone is haunting me like an ever leaving shadow.

A face! That held the angelic grace. My redemption!

No! No! I can't drag her into all this.

Pushing aside all these thoughts I head to my punching bag. Without wrapping any gloves on I start to kick and beat the hell out of the bag. My knuckles hurt, my hand is hurting.

Fuck! In fact my whole being is hurting! The look on Adamo's face, the betrayed look on her face! It still haunts my night.

Whenever I close my eyes I am reminded of that look of betrayal on her face!

"Done with hurting yourself?" A female voice breaks me from my chain of thoughts.

"Kiara, fuck off! I am not ready for your piece of shit now." I tell her.

"Is it only about Adamo or...is there somebody else too?"

I close my eyes and gather myself together. Kiara would be the last person on earth on whom I would like to charge. Shit she is Alessio's responsibility and that makes Kiara my responsibility too.

"Out Kiara. Don't make me regret what I am to do next."

"You won't hurt me Remo. I know that. "

Fuck! She knows it. The look that she bestows upon me with those eyes reminds me another pair of eyes!
Shit! Trust! Her eyes spoke of pure trust.

Trust! That I don't deserve! A word that is not fit to be etched to my soul. If I do it once I'll do it again. Christ! I am really a fucked up asshole.

"Or is it about Rachel."

Rachel!

A name that I have been trying to forget but seems to be engraved in every fiber of my body. Hearing her name itself shakes my whole being.

"You don't know anything about it Kiara. It's complicated. "

"Aren't we all complicated?" She questions me.

Hell yah!

"We all have made ourselves into such sophisticated beings that we have made it hard for others to comprehend us."

"Hell, even I don't know myself sometimes." It takes time for me to realize that the voice that spoke those words were mine only.

Kiara moves closer to me and places a hand on my shoulder.

"You don't have to complicate yourself Remo, let things happen the way it is supposed to be. Never block something good that is about to happen to us."

"I am not worth that good." I tell her moving away from her and moves towards the balcony facing the beautiful beach.

"We all tell that Remo, it's our way of looking at the things." She comes and stands by my side and looks upon the waves crashing against the stone.

"We all meet different people in the walk of our life, some make us laugh, some make us to cry, some make us to think and the list goes on and on." She turns to look straight into my eyes.

"And there are some who comes into our lives and touches every ounce of our being and every fiber of our body feels at ease. It feels as if all the puzzles that we were desperately trying to solve in our past falls back into the right place. They leave an imprint on us that even after of us trying can't wash away." She takes a minute to gather her thoughts and continues.

"Rachel was your answer for all the questions in your life Remo. Don't push her away. She's really the one! Don't push away the good happening in your life Remo."

Giving my hand a squeeze with her tiny hand she leaves me alone to the monotonous sound of the waves and my thoughts.

She's really the one!

Hi guys! Sorry for the late update. Life is unpredictable and causes absurd things to happen in your life. It happens in all our lives. I won't personalize it to be mine alone.

I will be updating by today or tomorrow so stay tuned. Love you all!

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