Creepypasta Magic ☽☉☾

7 Ordinary Items To Use As Weapons

1. Pot of Hot Coffee-

There's nothing like the smell of coffee brewing when you first wake up in the morning. And if you're ever attacked while pouring your cup of joe, you can take comfort in the fact that you're not just holding something wonderfully fragrant, but a great weapon as well. Smash the pot into your attacker's face. The blunt force will stun him, the shards of glass will embed in his kisser, and the scalding hot coffee will make him wish he stayed home that morning.

2. Coffee Mug-

The same principle as the coffee pot, just on a smaller scale. Throw the hot coffee from your mug into the attacker's face and then proceed to bash him in his fleshy mug with caffeinated ferocity.

 3. Fire Extinguisher-

Fire extinguishers cannot only save your life in a fire but in a violent attack as well. Spray the assailant in the face to temporarily distract him and disrupt his OODA Loop. While he's figuring out what's going on, forcefully bludgeon him in the head with the extinguisher's canister.

4. A Pen-

In the right hands, the pen can indeed be mightier than the sword. A stainless steel pen like this Zebra number can be used to stab an assailant. Hold it with an overhand grip and aim for vulnerable parts of the body like the face and throat. If you really want to up your writing-implement-as-weapon game, get a true tactical pen like this Smith & Wesson.

5. Keys-

Your keys can start your car or let you into your house. They can also savagely maim a violent attacker. Hold the keys in your hand so their points are coming out between the fingers of your fist. Proceed to punch your attacker in vulnerable parts of the body like the face and throat.

6. Locking Carabiner-

Carabineers are an important tool for mountain climbers and have become a go-to key holder for action-oriented gents. They can also serve as field-expedient knuckledusters in a pinch. If you want to use a carabiner as an improvised weapon, make sure it's big enough to fit around your fist and has a locking collar (to prevent it from snapping open while you punch a mo' fo'). While aluminum carabineers should be able to withstand the impact, for added strength, use a steel one.

7. Wristwatch-

For a variation on the above, turn your metal wristwatch into a quick-n-dirty knuckle buster by holding the bracelet inside your fist, and positioning its face across your middle knuckles. James Bond uses his Rolex Oyster Perpetual in this way to knock out a bad guy in On Her Majesty's Secret Service. Keep in mind that the impact of this move will likely break your timepiece. Bond was able to write off the destruction of his watch to his expense account. You won't. Of course, losing your wristwatch will be a small price to pay if it saves your life.