Once Upon A Time~ Ashton Irwin fanfiction (AU)

Part 11

3:30 am. That's what time the clock read when she snapped awake in the strange room, a cold sweat running over her. The nightmares were always there, ever since the night she tried to kill herself. It was always the same image: swallowing the last pill, making one last cut, this one parallel to her veins, and closing her eyes. Only when her eyes would close she wouldn't see blackness, she would see a room of fire, filled with her mother, and all of the students at her school. They would be standing around her, staring with flames behind their eyes, and they wouldn't speak. Not until she spoke. And every time she would speak, and every time they would start screaming. Screaming all of the things they said to her alive. Then her mother would approach and say in her ear "this will never end. Welcome home, bitch."

That's where Andi would wake up, every time. This time it was slightly different, because Ashton was in that fiery room, and he was screaming, too. Screaming about how he hated her, and it was all a game to see how long it would take her to break. She tried to shake the memory from her head as she took in the room around her. The sheets were thrown to the floor, the pillows askew, and a slight scrape across her knuckles. She must have hit the wall before she woke up.

She had only been awake for maybe a minute before she heard a knock at the door and saw Ashton slowly open it. She sat back on the bed, looking at him as he stood half asleep, a look of innocence and love in his eyes. He walked in, closed the door and sat beside her.

"I heard a loud noise...is everything okay?"

"Yeah. I just...I punched the wall."

"Woah there, Rocky! What did it do to you?" He tried to joke, before he saw her start to cry. "Andi hold on what's wrong? Sweetheart why are you crying? What's going on?"

"I had a nightmare. Well...another one. And you were in it. You told me you hated me, and that this is all a joke. And you looked so cruel...Ashton you looked like you wanted me dead."

At her words, he pulled her into his arms, not saying anything. After a few moments, her tears stopped and she began to pull away from his grasp. He looked into her eyes before slowly leaning in to place a kiss on her forehead.

"Are you going back to your room?" She asked, wiping the last few tears from her cheeks.

"I wish I didn't have to...but yes. I'm sorry," he responded with a frown.

"Can...can you stay for a few minutes? Please?" She asked, her voice coming out much more unstable than intended.

He nodded his head and pulled her back into his arms, running his fingers over her back. Her breathing slowed, and her muscles relaxed, signaling that she had fallen back to sleep. He gently lay her down, being sure to pull her blankets over her shoulders. He quietly stepped out of her room, looking back at her one last time before closing the door.

The next two weeks went about the same as that first night. Andi's nightmares wouldn't stop. After the first 4 days, Ashton began setting an alarm for 3:15 am, so he could be there for her as soon as Andi's nightmares woke her. At the end of the first week, he found himself sitting next to her in bed, waiting for her thrashing to begin. Taking the punches himself was worth it if he didn't have to see her bloodied hands every morning. By the end of the second week, her nightmares were non existent. She was convinced it was because Ashton had begun to let her sleep in his room. Something about his arms being wrapped around her as she slept, being able to hear his steady heart beat and feel his breath on her back made her comfortable--made her feel safe. Nothing could hurt her if he was there, and they both knew it.

He began to rely on her just as much as she relied on him. When they were apart at school, he found himself checking his phone repeatedly, hoping she had texted him. During passing periods, he would look for her in the halls, hoping to see her face--to see her smile for a brief second. Every day, he would wait outside the door to their music class, and as soon as he saw her, he'd pull her into his arms, kiss her forehead, and they would walk into class together, smiles worn across both of their faces. It became their routine, and without it, they would both rip at the seams.

One Friday, he didn't see her. He couldn't pull her into his arms at the end of the day, and he couldn't see her smile. He walked into the classroom, his head down, and took his seat, staring at the empty chair next to him the entire lesson. He walked home alone, and arrived to find Andi's room empty. For the first time in nearly a month, she wasn't there. He sat down on her now empty bed and stared at the walls, calling her and texting for hours trying to get ahold of her, trying to hear her voice, to know she was okay. But he didn't. When his mom got home, she found him curled up in bed, holding a sweater she had left behind.

The weekend passed and he didn't get any messages from her, and on Monday, he didn't see her in any classes. It was the same on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. 4 days without hearing her voice or seeing her smile. For four days, he didn't smile, he didn't play his drums...he could barely function. His mom did everything she could to make him feel better, but nothing worked. The bottom line was that he loved her with all of himself, and not having her there made him feel lost.

On Friday, things changed. On Friday, he saw her. On Friday, she was there, right in front of him. Only this time, there was no smile, there was no bounce in her step, and there was no eye contact. This time, she walked passed him with her sleeves pulled over her hands, her arms wrapped around her waist, and her eyes on the ground. He saw her face for a second, just long enough to see a bruise under her eye. Just long enough for his heart to shatter.