[29 June, 2020]
11:08 Pm.
P.S Based on messy thoughts.
And a pinch of tangled feelings.
I wonder, how it all faded away.
One moment, it was something,
And now, it's nothing.
Like it never was.
I've gone through so much,
Painted my heart with so
many wild emotions,
Until they too faded away.
But. I miss. I miss so much.
And it's gone. Like it never came.
Memories. All those that I moaned about.
I was so tired of carrying them around,
Bearing their weight, on my skin.
But now I wonder, where are those gone.
I touch my skin, and I feel nothing.
I've always been poetic, dearest.
The girl who gazes at stars at night.
Who knows how to trace memories on skin,
Who hears silent poetry. Who loved too much.
But. How? How can my fingers grasp nothing?
Not a single memory, wild or old. Nothing.
And that leaves me to wonder.
Is this what feels like, to move on?
To marvel at how no thoughts
of what once was haunts me.
Or to think, have I simply,
somehow, stopped?
Why am I not thinking?
How, I wonder.
How can the numbness
be gone? How can I hurt again?
And feel alive.
I want to dance this moment away.
Before fresh thoughts sweep me off my feets.
I want to write, before this emotion leaves me.
Dearest, I can not tell.
Happiness never felt like this.
But how can I be?
Sad. Torn. Sore.
When my dearest is gone?
Whom I gave my heart,
My soul, my everything.
Who lit up my life like fireworks,
And yet hurt me so much.
Who wouldn't leave,
Even when I begged.
Just imagine my pain, my misery.
To ask whom I love, to leave me.
Too many feelings. All those that I felt.
Where are they gone? Did they too left?
I should be happy.
And maybe, I am.
But my lips sigh.
I need some time.
I need to listen, to my heart.
And feel what I can, before it falls apart.
I want to remember,
Though it hurts.
I want to breathe again.
Before I fall apart.
I don't know how long it will take.
Or when it may happen.
All I know is, I can't let this feeling go.
I want to breathe.
I want to remember.
All of it. Everything.
Before I whisper goodbye.
And let go of what is left.
I can never get back,
What once was.
But. I wish. One day.
Nothing will feel like something again.
YOU ARE READING
Songs That My Heart Sings. ✔️
Poetry*Here are some songs that my heart sang.* Broken, battered, but beautiful, I hope you get to see this book as I do. For it whispers secrets that were never said, and carries a bittersweet taste. And a promise, of everlasting hope. Lets trace these p...
