The Calm After the Storm (Northern Trail Series #1)

Chapter 39

Serena's POV,

It's almost sunset when the plane boarded in Basco Airport. I found myself gnawing on the inside of my cheeks while anxiously tapping my fingers on my lap. Come on. Make it fast. I keep chanting inside my head.

"May something talaga sa hangin kapag nasa countryside ka, no?" bulalas ni Lizzy nang makalabas na kami ng eroplano. She's spreading her arms in the air as if she's one with the wind.

"I know right. Napakaswerte ng babaitang ito at ganitong hangin ang nalalanghap habang lumalaki. Now I know kung bakit ganyan itsura mo, Serena." si Ace habang nagseselfie.

Pumara ako ng tricycle. Doon ay halos paulanan nilang dalawa ng papuri ang bawat lugar na nadadaanan. Maging si manong ay nagmistulang tour guide sa dami ng tanong ng dalawa.

"Nakakapagsisi talagang sa dami ko ng lugar at bansang napuntahan ay kahit kailan hindi ko man lang naisipang pumunta dito. Mygad!" ani Lizzy sa nanghihinayang na tono.

"OMG! Girl, same!" Ace retorted.

Nanatili akong kalmado sa byahe. Iniiwasan ko na talagang kabahan dahil baka magkanda letse-letse na naman. Madalas akong pinapangunahan ng aking mga emosyon.

I tend to act based on my emotion before I've seen things through the eyes of other people. They were like storms inside my head whirling nonstop, taking over my whole existence. It feels like it's swallowing me whole and I'm always in a dillema.

I also have a bad habit of putting someone else to blame when I'm in a dire situation of pain, thinking it's the only way to lessen the burden. Besides, it was easy to point fingers at someone. I thought that it was so unfair that I am the only one suffering. But as I grow up, I realized that the only way for the pain to subside is to suck it all up. Let it consume you. Let it devour you. Pain is a proof that we are human beings. Flawed. Capable of hurting anybody too. If you don't eat pain, pain will be the one to eat you up. Tough call, isn't it? But what choice do we have?

I became obsessed of growing up so bad as well, because I used to believe that when you became a full grown individual with all your experiences as your shield, you will be tough and indestructible. Truth is, I never became immune to pain. It's still there. I just get used to it.

May mga pagkakataon pa rin na dumarating ako sa puntong nagsasara ang aking isipan sa mga bagay na hirap kong paniwalaan. Akala ko tama na ang ginagawa ko. Nalalaman ko lang na mali na pala kapag naramdaman ko na ang epekto nito sa akin at sa mga tao sa paligid ko. Nakakalungkot kasi saka ko lang napagtatanto na nagkamali na pala ako kapag may tao ng nasasaktan sa mga naging aksiyon at desisisyon ko. Para bang palagi na lang may pusong mawawasak para lamang sa ikatututo ko. Like people need to bleed just for the sake of my 'growing up'.

Pero ngayon hindi na ako basta-basta susuko. I know what I want. I want to calm the storm inside of me. I will calm it without shattering anyone's hearts. I will wait for it to pass me by and see the calm after the storm and the peace to return once more.

"Wow, Serena! This is your home?" hindi makapaniwalang tanong ni Lizzy nang makarating na kami sa tabing dagat kung saan nakatirik ang nag-iisang bahay, sa tabi nito ay ang lighthouse.

"Oo, dito ako lumaki. Hindi ito ang mismong bahay. Mas maliit pa dito—"

"Are you kidding me? This is better than any big houses in the city. Imagine waking up next to the sea. And the lighthouse. Wow. So therapeutic.." Lizzy dreamily said as she approached the lighthouse. Pero kaagad din itong pinigilan ni Ace.

"Serena, picture lang kami ni Lizzy sa dalampasigan ha? Take your time. Sana pagbalik mo may singsing na diyan sa daliri mo. Charot! Dito ka nga Lizzy eepal ka pa diyan eh!" ani Ace at hinigit na si Lizzy papalayo. I waved at them while they were hopping joyfully towards the shore.