Worlds Away

Chapter Twelve: Please

Harrison grew and grew. I grew to fall back in love with Jack. Jack and I have been figuring out parenting one sleepless night at a time. Right now the boy was turning 6 months old. I couldn't believe we had a 6-month-old baby. It feels like yesterday he a little baby. I laugh at my memories of him peeing down the front of Jack and laughing at him. I went to wake Harrison up. I rubbed his back and spoke to him softly.

"morning baby boy. It's your half birthday!" I said excitedly but also in a weird voice.

I had definitely mastered the baby talking voice. Jack just used his regular voice and made weird voices that seemed to make Harrison happy. Harrison did not like though when we kissed. Kolbi came and stayed a few nights at Jack's apartment. Kolbi was obsessed with Harrison.

Harrison's tint of red hair stayed. He had sort of a strawberry blonde look about him. It was weird because his hair wasn't blonde but it was not red. It was hard to explain to people. He definitely got a bit of curly hair though which wasn't a bad thing. Jack and I both had curly hair.

"Morning Harrison! Morning Logan!" Alex said sitting at Jack's island on a laptop.

"Morning Uncle Alex," I took Harrison's hand and moved it to wave.

Alex smiled and made grabby hands for Harrison. I moved the baby from my hip into my two hands to pass him off to Alex. Alex placed Harrison on his hip before dancing around the open kitchen and dining room.

"someone is 6 months today!" Alex said pretending to throw Harrison in the air.

He lifted the small boy up in the air then back down making noises similar to that of a helicopter. Alex always got the best laughs out of Harrison. He and Carlos were the people to get Harrison to laugh. The only reason Alex was over was due to the fact Harrison had a doctor's appointment.

"You know if you and Jack have another kid you'll have to start figuring out how to handle shot time," Alex laughed and placed Harrison on his hip walking back to the island to shut his laptop.

"That isn't happening for a while Alex," I said while Jack choked on his cereal.

"Really because you two aren't the quietest individuals I have met," Alex winked.

"Okay ass hat, give me my son and leave," I said putting my hands out for Harrison.

"No he is my nephew and I love him. Besides I need Jack for a few. I need to go over song ideas and we need to start the writing process. I am going to steal your man-"

"Child," I interrupted.

"I am going to steal your Jack in a few days when Rian flies back in. We will probably start really knocking out shit. I mean we will gladly take Harrison with us on an all guys trip though right buddy?" Alex asked the 6-month-old baby as he just giggled and pounded Alex's chest lightly.

"I will think about letting you guys have him for a few days. No promises though Alex. I have a lot of, concerns about you all with my baby for nights unsupervised. It's not that I don't trust you. I just I don't know how to put this," I paused trying to find my words

"You like to drink and sometimes I think it can get a little out of control and while you are adults and that is fine. I just need someone to be an adult around my child. I think you have earned that but it's concerning me not being there he is still really little." I shrugged walking over to Alex and brushing Harrison's hair with my fingers.

"What if Lisa and I take him for a night and you guys have a date night and get working on baby number 2 preferable another boy for Harrison," Alex joked.

I shook my head. Alex knew this was a touchy subject because I didn't want kids then hearing Harrison's heartbeat and everything it solidified the feeling of Harrison being a human. I didn't know his name or who he'd be but I couldn't get that tiny sound out of my head. Ryleigh and Zack were still struggling to try and conceive while Lisa had openly mentioned she and Alex weren't actively trying for a child but weren't opposed to the idea. Ryleigh was sort of annoyed with the fact Jenna had brought up at that same lunch it was ironic how easy it was for Jack and I to fall pregnant with Harrison.

It felt like my relationship with Ryleigh was on the rocks because of Harrison. While in some way I knew it really hurt her and Zack to watch Harrison grow up knowing they would have had a child a few months older than Harrison. I knew they were also really happy for us at the same time. Ryleigh told me they had debated going to see a fertility specialist to just make sure everything was okay.

I was however worried about Harrison. I never really looked over his paperwork from when he was born. I knew they had done a hearing test on him when he was an infant but there is something about him. When you call his name or even go to wake up. It's like he may have some hearing difficult because when you speak really softly Harrison is almost non-responsive to you. I think that is why it's a good thing everyone is so loud. It was hard on me though to watch Harrison struggle. I wanted to mention it to the doctor but everyone keeps assuring me that it is probably nothing.

I walked into Jack's bedroom and grabbed a random pair of my skinny jeans and a t-shirt. I was back to my pre-pregnancy weight and was fairly in shape but there were some stretch marks that made me feel very insecure. I had them on my thighs and on my stomach. There were moments where I was incredibly proud of my body for giving me a tiny human and another part of me that never wanted him and felt guilty for that.

"Baby?" Jack asked as I stood in front of the mirror with my shirt up.

I let the shirt fall around my waistline. I turned to look at his feet as he walked around his apartment in socks. Jack came and put his arms around my waist and nudged me with his head.

"I love you and I know you may not believe it but I still think you are hot as fuck."

Jack kissed my ear as I nodded into his chest as he picked me up and threw me onto his bed. Jack then picked up a pair of his skinny jeans from the floor. He pulled a random black shirt from his closet and slipped off his pajama pants. He went to a dresser to pull out a pair of boxers slipping them on then the dirty skinny jeans. I watched as Jack got dressed with easer never stopping to worry about his self-image. I wish I could be like him in that way.

"Jack I think we should have Harrison's hearing checked," I spoke out of nowhere as Jack started to loop a belt around his waist.

"is it really worth it though?" Jack had been told by a few people he knew that it can be something kids grow out of as they get older.

"I mean what if something is really wrong. What if he is deaf or what if he becomes dea-"

"Don't say that. Please."

"Jack what if he is? Would you really not love Harrison?" I asked looking at him as he looked at the clasp to his belt.

Jack finished putting his belt on before getting a pair of shoes and slipping out of his bedroom. I flopped backed on the bed wondering if it was a good idea to even push the issue anymore.