somethin' stupid

season 1 episode 4

AT KURT HUMMEL'S HOUSE...

"Tina, it's not that hard! It's 1, 2, 3 and slap the butt." Kurt rolls his eyes "Dani hop in here"

I get up off the sofa and take Tina's place in the formation. We run through the dance but we stop abruptly when Kurt's dad walks down the stairs.

kurt turns around to face his father

"dad. you're home early"

"deadliest catch is on" mr hummel responds. "what're you wearing?"

"it's a unitard. guys wear them to... workout nowadays" kurt says nervously "do sports. they wick sweat from the body"

"f-f-f football" tina studders

"yeah. all the football players wear them. totally jock chic" kurt says

"yeah kurts on the football team now" brittany says as kurt, tina and i give her a death glare. "he's the kicker. that's the smallest guy on the team right?"

"yeah. they're just helping me with some conditioning work" kurt says pulling at his sequin tie

"really. i used to play football when i was at JC" mr hummel says. "but then i busted my knee, popping wheelies on my bike"

"cool. i guess we'll have something to talk about then"

"so are one of you two his girlfriend?"

kurt looks at the three of us and i try to avoid eye contact. hoping he doesn't choose me

i feel his arm wrap around my waist

"but i'm not ready to be exclusive just yet"

"just keep the music down. can't hear myself think up there" mr hummel says, turning around going up the stairs. "hey kurt." he stops on the stairs. "be sure to get me a ticket to your first game"

and then he walks out of the room, leaving the four of us shocked

AT BREADSTIX...

"and then" i say, taking a bite out of the breadstick in my hand "his DAD comes down to see us dancing to beyonce. and of course, brittany says that Kurt's the football team's new kicker!"

I watch as Finn's eyes practically fall out of his skull

"no she didn't" he says, jaw on the ground but I just nod

"Yup"

Finn laughs and shakes his head

"There's no way Puck would ever let him on that field"

"well, Puck isn't the coach. he's just an asshole who plays football" Finn snorts at my response

"You should tell him that, really put him in his place. He'd love it"

"Santana would probably mistake that for me flirting with him. Then she'll yank my hair off my head" I say, before taking a sip of my rootbeer

"how are things going- ya know, with the girls and stuff" Finn asks me and I give him a confused look

"uh, they're going well. Santana isn't up my ass as much, Quinn and I have always been best friends, and Brittany-" I stop and think before I say anything. I wouldn't want any details coming out from when Brittany and I were practicing my speech for the election. "Brittany's just Brittany. You gotta love her"

"She's hilarious. but unintentionally, which sorta makes it funnier but sometimes I feel bad for her because she's so stupid"

"dude, don't say that" I hit Finn softly with my fist "You can't just say that about people. Especially if it's something they're insecure about"