Who're We to Say? - a kiribaku fic

Again?

Bakugou pov

It had been a month since the incident with that crazy chick and Eiji and I had kept a close watch on the news and hadn't seen any stories like that again so that was reassuring. I promised to never cut again and I've been sticking to it. We found ourselves on the couch in the lounge with the rest of the squad as we screamed out songs during karaoke night. Pikachu decided to sing the bi anthem; Sweater Weather. Then Ashido hit it with Toxic and I couldn't help but join and dance with her. Eijiro tried flattering me by singing Firework and honestly it kind of worked. Sero sang the absolute fucking bop that is Queen of Disaster. It lands on my actual turn and I decide on Sunflower because I love my fucking boyfriend.

We all have the grandest fucking time and despite the lack of alcohol we all seemed drunk as shit on just the presence of the others. We really are a bunch of fucking idiots aren't we? Oh well, at least now I'm enjoying my life and not just getting by. I think so at least.

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One insanely long night later we all drag ourselves away from each other and to the dorms. Dumbass couple part 1 went to their room talking about who's making the next batch of edibles, Ashido complains about Round Face being asleep and I laugh at her only to be cut of by Ei kissing me and apologizing for my behavior dragging me away. We both ended up turning around and flipping the other off.

Eijiro and I land in my dorm due to the lack of clutter or should I say 'manly decorating' and I pull him on the bed kissing him gently.

"I. Love. You. So. Fucking. Much. Eijiro." I said kissing him in between words.
"I. Love. You. Too. Now. Please. Stop. With. The. Butterfly. Kisses."
"Never." I flipped us around so I could smother him to the fullest which left him a laughing mess, causing me to pause. "What? Something funny about my affection, asshat?"
"No not at all it's just really out of the ordinary. You won't find me complaining cause it's really cute."
"Don't call me cute."
"Why shouldn't I? You're my cute, precious, submissive boyfriend." He flipped us so I was under him once again.

He grabbed my face before kissing me hard and it was so damn hot that I didn't even bother refuting anything he said. The heated make out session continued for a few more minutes before we both just flat out fell asleep clinging onto the other.

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I wake up to Eijiro's hair in my mouth and honestly it's less unpleasant than I thought it would be. Still fucking disgusting though. Spitting it out I bask in the early Saturday morning sunlight as well as I could while being crushed under my boyfriend who's built like a fucking brick shithouse. Yeah, this is a pretty great way to wake up in the morning, not.

"Eijiro, wake up. You're crushing me. Eijirooooooo move your thicc ass, brick bitch."
"G'moooornin Katsu." He rolls off me holding me to his chest.
"Ugh, good morning love."
"That whole sentence contradicts itself."
"Ssshhhut up and let me enjoy the morning. You crushed me I have rights."

We lay in each other's arms for a long perfect hour. I don't know what I did to be able to have you Eijiro. All mine and so so perfect, you keep me grounded I feel loved and you have everything that is me. I'm yours, every word profane or not is yours each inch of my scarred and damaged body. One day we'll have the most perfect lives together now that I'm recovering I can accept your love, and not feel guilty about it. I love you Eiji. I love you so incredibly much. I love you. I love you more than myself. I love you so much I forget why I find myself so unbearable.

He finally pulls me up to my feet after getting up from the bed and we head down to the lounge. There we see Ashido and Ei drags me over.

"Mornin' Mina!"
"Kiri! Bitch Boy! How'd y'all sleep?"
"He slept like a rock. Specifically one that crushes unsuspecting boyfriends."
"That's rouggggghhhhhh."
"Suki I said I'm sorry."
"I know I'm just stating facts. And the fact it is that you crushed me with your thicc ass."
"Fine."
"Kiri you didn't deny that you were thicc."
"Because I am."
"True."
"Ashido you don't get to call my boyfriend thicc."
"Well I speak the truth so there."
"Tch."

I walk off and Ashido laughs before Eiji tells me he's gonna hang with her. So reluctantly I go back to my room alone, because I'm not as interesting as Ashido apparently. Well whatever it's been a while since I've had me time and honestly I'm down for some solitary weird shit to do.

I go to my drawer and grab my acrylics, and decide. I'm already a fucking clown might as well make it official. So I take a flat brush dunk it into the white and begin to paint my face. Who gives a shit if I break out?! I'm by myself and it's me time. I slather my face in the slowly drying acrylic until I reach my full potential.

Once that step is complete I take like 15 shirtless mirror selfies for that solid self validation despite my scars, but I can't get better until I acknowledge their existence and how bad it is... right? Right. Though I have the slight twinge of an urge to cut the more that I stare at them, I know I won't and yet my mind supplies reasons I should.

You're just bothering them, hardly being able to be away from your boyfriend for one day. You waste their time and you know it. You self centered, bastard. Why don't you just punish yourself instead of putting on pity parties? Or even better yet, delete yourself from the equation. No, what am I thinking, my friends love me and I'm not a waste of space, air, or time.

And yet I did it again. It was like I just blacked out, like I wasn't really there. Now once again I'm bleeding from my wrists and Eijiro is going to worry. I should be worried. My therapist is going to be pissed off. I'm calm as I bandage myself up and throw on his crimson riot hoodie. My favorite one. As the cold of winter really sinks it's teeth in I breathe in deeply. It's big on me, especially since Eijiro grew since first year. I used to be taller than him; not anymore.

I jump to touch the top of my doorway. When was the last time I even jumped. I have no fucking clue, as I reach up I feel the bandage rub against my arm yet I could care less. Well that's not true I do care, I should stop. I promised Ei, I'm fucking useless for breaking such an important promise. God dammit I want to text bitch tits but she's with Ei. I should tell him, I should tell him. I should tell him, but I won't.

He'd be crushed and I can't do that to him, but we tell each other everything. He deserves to know after everything we've been through together. For crying out loud we've had sex. Twice! One of which was multiple god damned rounds. Tell him damn it! Tell him tell him tell him tell him tell him tell him te— SHUT UP SHUT THE HELL UP ASS HAT! I don't have to tell him. He doesn't have to know what I've done.

I can't tell him what I've done.

A/n the things he does are based off a conversation I had with a friend at like midnight when I started writing this chapter and when I say midnight I mean 2 in the morning. Shit got weird. This is writing itself. Have a great day/night